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The Way Through...

5/31/2022

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The Way Through…
Is with presence.  With breath.  With showing up.  Steadily, consistently, slowly… one moment at a time.  One breath at a time. 

As long as your heart is beating.  As long as you breathe.  There is hope.  You are here.  You can be part of a better tomorrow.  In whatever way you are called. 

So much pain surrounds us, bombards us, ceaselessly, endlessly, an onslaught of horror and devastating destruction beating our tender hearts.  We may even feel numb to it at times – our systems simply can’t take in any more.  This is a brilliant, inherent form of self-protection.  We are not meant to live in stress 24/7, and yet that is what our world offers us. 

Each of us has particular causes that tug at our hearts, keep us awake at night.  Many have so many causes pulling at us that we feel stuck, spinning, uncertain of what to do or where to even try to do something that matters. 

We may feel guilty that we aren’t doing enough.  That we’re not on the front lines, protesting, marching, directly supporting survivors.  We look at other people and feel inadequate.  We feel the weight of the need and the impossibility of holding it up ourselves.  The demand is intense, and perhaps, at times, in our sense of not-enoughness, we collapse.  We surrender in defeat and don’t even do the one thing that we could do.

Sometimes we need beautiful, vital self-compassion or tender care for our hurting, depleted souls. Understandably, we need a break.  Sometimes we stay silent because our voice feels too small, our words ineloquent, our knowledge lacking.  Sometimes we pretend we’re ok and we soldier on, because we think that’s what we’re supposed to do.

Often, we don’t ask for help.  We forget there are others feeling exactly as we do, and that together we are stronger.  Together we are a force that can move mountains.  We are impatient and want results right away, so we forget to notice the tiny steps of hope and progress. 

We may not even know what to do.  So, begin with presence.  Allow yourself to get quiet and still so you can hear the inner guidance.  Ask a question, “What would you have me know?” whether that’s to Love. God, the Universe, or your own heart or soul.  Ask, “What is mine to do?”  Is there an action you feel called toward?  Whether it feels enough or not, what is part of your mission in this life?  What can you offer? 

If you are depleted, then first rest.  Fill yourself up.  You cannot give when you are not abundantly filled.  Do this with complete permission and lack of guilt.  We need you restored.  This rest will benefit everyone.  There are many who share your concerns.  We can take turns showing up. 
The one thing I am certain of is that it is our job to make it through.  To find our way to what’s next.  I don’t know if there is “another side” to the pain you’re feeling right now, but I do know there’s another day and a natural, messy, complex evolution.  I know for certain that things in this moment will change.  For better or for worse?  I don’t know. 

We transform meaningless pain into meaningful pain when we offer our heart’s gifts to the world.  Whether the heart touches one other person who needs your words or gentle caress or you touch millions with your words and actions, it does not matter.  What matters is that you find your way.  Your expression.  Your next teeny tiny or gigantic step. 

Along the way allow yourself to feel everything that you feel.  Sometimes all at once.  Our hearts can hold it all.  Our souls know how to be with extreme opposites.  You don’t need to deny moments of joy in favor of heartache – invite them both in.  You don’t need to push down the outrage that is screaming to be unleashed. 

You are well-resourced to find ways to feel, to release, to express as part of the healing and growing journey we are each on.  When you feel not well-resourced, reach out.  Get help.  Invite people into your life who can help you find your next breath or your next step. 

Let go of expectation.  Stop comparing yourself to what others are doing.  You have your own way.  Your own way of dealing.  Your own way of helping.  Your own way of healing.  And your own way of difference-making. 

Some are on the front line, marching, protesting, shouting. Some will run for office.  Some will write letters and send money.  Some will offer practices that nourish and nurture others.  Some will write poems or posts that speak to the hearts of someone else.  Some will offer food, shelter, blankets, and clothes filled with love.  Others will silently send their loving kindness meditation and their prayers out into the world.  Every bit of it matters.  Stop comparing and judging.  We need it all. 

What’s your way through?  Where will you begin in this moment?  What is it that your heart, soul, mind, and body need right now?  How filled up are you?  Do you need to step away to be recharged?  (We offer our phone that luxury – let’s offer it to ourselves!).  Do you need to reach out and connect with someone to help or be helped?  In different moments each of these things is a valid response.  Each one will feel right at times. 

Whatever you do, begin with breath. Begin with love.  Come into your doing from the heart, holding an intention of highest and best.  Begin with care and compassion for yourself so these are the energies you exude out into the world.  If you are not filled with these qualities, you will find yourself burned out, resentful, bitter, and that is what will bleed into even your best-intentioned offerings. 

Love, what would you have me know this day?  That is the question that’s alive in my heart.  This is the place from which I long to be led.  And so, I ask. 

In response I hear, “My dear, this is a painful time.  Your heart is breaking – again.  It breaks over and over with every death and every senseless act of violence.  It breaks when you hear the despair.  Your soul feels the pain of loss, for all the families.  Your heart is tender.  Care for it and then offer love.  Send it out in waves – through your writing and through your prayers.  You will know when there is another action to take.  For now, let this be enough.  I am with you.  I love you.” 

Here's a meditation "The Way Through" to support you.  


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Love, What Would You Have Me Know This Day?

5/24/2022

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PictureHeart in the Sky - Image by Vlad Ymyr from Pixabay
Thank you, Liz Gilbert, for this beautiful question (you can hear Liz talk about it on her recent podcast conversation with Glennon Doyle here). 

I’ve added this question at the end of my journaling each morning.  I write the question and I listen and write down the response I receive, simply allowing the words to flow through my pen.  I LOVE this question because it gets me out of my head and into the energy of Love itself.  An energy that we need to connect with more than ever.  An energy that is being shouted over by voices of fear, hatred, and division.  An energy that lives within each one of us, but may come through as more subtle or quiet. 




Although Love also comes through fiercely at times – in the voice of a Mama Bear defending her child.  Or a leader in social justice who just can’t take the hatred and division one more minute.  In my own voice as I try to break through the prevailing messages about addiction and recovery. 

As I’ve written this question for the past week, some themes have emerged in the responses that come through.
  1. I am loved. Every message includes an explicit “I love you.”
  2. I am not alone.  Love says, “I am right here,” and “You do not have to figure all of this out!”
  3. We’ve got this (whatever “this” is).
  4. Breathe – lots and lots of messages to slow down and breathe.
  5. Reassurance that I am held and encouragement to show up and live.

A couple of my favorite messages (though, really, I love them all!):

Day One - A message of surrender:

“Surrender…for all of it.  Your health.  Big life decisions.  Your sons’ lives.  The work you do with people.  Surrender.  Get out of the way.  Let me in – let me work through you.  Show up where you are called and as you feel called.  Trust that you will be led.  Surrender – save yourself the energy for where it is needed.  Act when you get the nudges.  Do your part, of course.  But you don’t need to do my part or all the parts.  You can trust the people to show up for their own lives.  You, my dear, are not the benevolent knower of all things.  You, my love, do not have anyone else’s answers.  You’re off the hook.  I love you.  Rest easy.”

Day Two - A message of trust and leaning in in uncertain times.  I needed to hear this.  As I wrote last week in “No Pressure.  Presence”, every time is an uncertain time.  It feels extra uncertain these days with so much chaos, division, and devastation in the world:

“I’m right here.  You are wrapped in so much love, even in the unknown time.  Lean into me.  Lean into your family of people who love you so very much.  Let yourself be held and supported.  And LIVE.  Live with the urgency that comes from this day, from appreciating the life that’s right here, right now even when you don’t know what’s next.  And, regardless of what’s next, believe in your body’s ability to heal – remember that.  Trust it.  Allow it.  You get to write your story of this adventure.  And, right now that means to just take life one day, one moment, at a time.  None of us knows how long we have so don’t miss what’s right here… Live.  Love.  Honor and care for yourself, and don’t miss the beauty that is available even in the hard and scary times.  You never know what’s possible.  I love you.”

By taking the time for these short communications with Love, I am able to tap into a different energy from what I might find out there in the outside world.  I am able to listen to the language of my heart and soul.  I am reminded of things I already know deep down inside.  My mind quiets a bit.  My nervous system relaxes a bit.  At least for a moment. 

These moments build on one another and I expand my capacity to bring love out into the world.  It softens me.  It opens my heart.  It emboldens me to speak out where in the past I might have stayed silent – to speak up where people are being harmed.  To stand up for what I believe in.  To strengthen and build relationships.   I feel filled with courage and compassion.
​​
Your Invitation:
I’d love for you to give it a try.  Take a moment and ask, “Love, what would you have me know this day?” Ask it whenever you like - as a daily practice or when you're facing a challenge.  When you're struggling or unsure.  Ask.  Listen.  See what comes through. 

Here's a meditation to support you.  Love, What Would You Have Me Know This Day? 

Share if you like – I do believe these messages are Universal ones meant to be heard by many. 
​
How does it feel to take this time to connect with and listen to Love?  How might this inquiry benefit you?  

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No Pressure.  Presence.

5/18/2022

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Right here, right now.  This is the only moment I am guaranteed.  So, how do I want to live it?  Who do I want to be?  How do I want to show up? What impact do I want to have on those around me and on some small piece of the world? 

(It’s becoming clear why my theme for April’s A to Z Blog Challenge was Question (Almost) Everything!  I do love questions and what they open up within us!)

Last week I wrote about Life, Death, and Rebirth as related to what I see happening in the world, particularly in this season of Spring.  I wasn’t necessarily thinking about what happens within each one of us. 

But, if we are alive, and we are to die (and we aren’t really certain about rebirth, though I have my ideas), how to make this moment, this day count is a powerful, compelling question to sit with.  No pressure… simply presence.  Awareness. Choice. 

Every single one of us knows we will die – that this life will end.  And, for whatever reason, we sometimes forget to live with that truth as a guiding light.  We act as if we have forever – endless, limitless time. 

Your Last Day
 
What would you do
if you learned you had
one day to live?
No second chance…
this was it.
 
What changes would you make?
Who would you connect with?
How would you spend your time?
What would you let go of?
 
Why do we act as if
we have an endless reservoir of time,
so we’ll get to it “some day?”
 
The truth is, none of us know
when we will leave this earth.
So, why do we wait?
Why are we so out of touch
or careless with our ways
and our days?
 
We all know we have
limited time here.
Why do we pretend otherwise?
Why wait to forgive,
and love,
and be our full, beautiful selves?
 
This is so basic
so simple,
so profound,
and so overlooked.
 
Not wanting to
think about death,
we fail to live
as if life really mattered.
 
Let’s wake up and begin today
to cherish the people,
the moments,
the perfect expressions of self.
And live as if today,
this moment,
was all we had.
 
©Barb Klein, 2016 from 111 Invitations: Step into the Full Richness of Life
 
We put things off or we wait for the big dream to come true before we can be happy.  We wait til everything is “just right” before we get married, have a baby, move, or retire. We hesitate, feeling not ready until we take one more class, do one more edit, get one more certification.  We fail to hit "send" on the manuscript.  Sometimes we wait too long.  I’ve seen people retire with grand dreams and die very soon after, before they have had a chance to do any of the things they put off. 

So, how do we live while we’re here?  One thing I learned from my beautiful vibrant friend, Mary Lally, is to “live your f’in life!” Thankfully, she had a doctor who gave her this advice, even when she was living with the uncertainty of advanced stage ovarian cancer in the time of Covid.  She knew that this moment is the one we are guaranteed – take it.  Show up for it.  This is my intention, no matter what the future holds. 

To live life doesn’t mean you have to do big or grand things.  “Small” things count so much and may constitute the majority of our days. 

How do I want to live this day?  With love.  With joy.  With hope.  Inviting in new beginnings and fresh possibilities.  Open.  Grateful.  Present.  One moment at a time. Letting "good enough" be good enough.  No pressure.  Just presence.  Love.  Love for myself, for the people I love, and for life itself, however long it may be. 

How about you?  How do you want to live this day?  Please share.  Please live.  You matter. 

Here’s a little musical invitation from the amazing Pink: The Last Song of Your Life. 
And a meditation, if you like, with a reading of "A Mystery" from 111 Invitations - Presence. 

Please consider this your invitation to live.  Fully.  Whatever that looks like and means to you. 

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Life, Death, and Rebirth

5/10/2022

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This is the name of one of the Tai Chi moves we do in Tai Chi for Recovery, and it strikes me that this is what this season of Spring is all about.

Nature is making it abundantly clear that we are in a time of transition.  Each of these elements: life, death, and rebirth are at play.

I see life in the trees and flowers budding and springing to life, in the baby ducklings scurrying to keep up with their mother as they somersault haphazardly off the bank, frantic to not be left behind.  There is life in the call of the migrating loons on our lake – these visitors that are only here for a short while.  The longer days with more sunshine and the skies filled with birds flitting busily about feel very much alive.

As trees and plants come to life, we can also see the ones that did not make it.  The death and decayed material on the forest floor that now becomes the base of life for new growth. 

Rebirth – the perennials and bulbs that miraculously burst through the ground after so many months of hibernation, resting, doing whatever magical things they do in the soil when the snow and grey days are here.   The tiny lilacs, their buds the size of a tiny pearl, slowly becoming more vibrant, more open each day.

And I am reminded of these cycles that live within each one of us all the time.  We are always in transition, whether we know it or not.  Physically our bodies change every single day – as Wayne Dyer used to remind us, we are not the body we were at 6 months old, even though we are still the same person. 

As we learn, grow, and evolve, our thoughts change. We find new ways. We unlearn old ones that are not helpful and maybe even harmful.  We replace old, destructive habits with new healthy ones.  We slip back.  We begin again.  Life, death, rebirth. 

Bursts of inspiration and energy carry us toward possibility.  Fear and doubt stop us in our tracks.  Then we begin again, slowly gaining traction.  Life, death, rebirth. 

Dreams and ideas fall away as new ones come to light.  Roles are abandoned or redefined.  We step into a new sense of self, perhaps one that feels more aligned with who we are in this chapter of our life. 

It seems in every group I participate in, people are talking about feeling “up in the air,” uncertain of the future.  I sense a heightened awareness to the truth that we don’t know what lies ahead.  We don’t know.  Individually and collectively, we have no ability to see, with certainty, how our next move will play out down the line.  For some at some times this brings fear and anxiety.  We want to know.  Our minds love to think they’re in charge and that if we craft just the right plan, then surely, we’ll be ok.  We’ll be safe.  Now we can go ahead.  We forget that plans are destined to be changed. 

Others are more comfortable with stepping out into risks, taking a chance, making the next move that feels like the next right or best step.  We do what we can to set ourselves up for success. And, as we step into action, maybe we weigh pros and cons.  We do the research, play out scenarios, try to prepare for all that could come up.  (I certainly do that and have likely wasted a lot of time and energy in the past in this mental activity – somehow it makes me feel better.  Gives me a false sense of security).  Sometimes we simply take a leap of faith, trusting that if we don’t learn to fly, the net will appear. 

On my last retreat I spoke about the sense that my heart just keeps breaking open.  A friend asked what that looks like.  The best answer I could give is that I’m filling with compassion to the extent that I can no longer tolerate things that are not Love.  That I feel both a sense of urgency and also a call to slow down and savor.  To pause and notice the teeny tiny buds, to listen to the birds, to not miss life’s unfolding.  To really be present with a friend.  To reach out and put everything else aside so that I can just listen and hear what’s going on in her heart.  To stop telling my son what to do, but to get curious, ask, and give him space to open his heart to me.  To share our thoughts, our feelings with a sense that what we’re up to is somehow very, very sacred. 

And, also, urgency… I feel a pull to show up more and more authentically, to speak up, to speak out, to be part of the revolutionary work I am called to.  To notice that there are more causes that need attention than I can even imagine, and if I try to take them all on, I will be completely burnt out and ineffective in everything I do.  So, slowing down, asking within and getting clear on what causes I am here to serve.  Howard Thurman’s words live in my heart:

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”

The energy of these words pulses through my heart and veins.  I can literally feel it calling me to life.  Letting go of ideas I’ve had about who I was or what I should be doing – allowing them to die away so that I can be reborn into this new day.  Aligning more and more with what Parker Palmer calls my “soul’s imperative…”  That call which I cannot deny. 

Can you feel this within yourself?  This letting go or dying off of old things, old ways, as you step into new life with fresh energy, new possibility, new beginnings to be born anew as this next version of you? 

When I witness people release a career that’s been bogging them down for decades and allow themselves to feel the excitement of a fresh possibility, as they allow their creative muse to take them to a dream that’s been hidden or a light that beckons, I can feel them coming to life! There is a tingling in the air when someone listens to the call of their heart or soul. When someone says “Yes!” to a dream they have no idea how to fulfill. When they simply take that first small step.  Life in the making! 


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    About me...

    I am a writer, coach, and teacher, and I love capturing life's many moments through writing, whether that be journalling, blogging, poetry, or essay.  I have always found the written word as a natural way for me to express what lies within.  

    This is the space where we get real.  I will write about my life experiences and things that I find my clients encounter in their daily lives.   

    What's real for you? What would you like me to write about?  Feel free to share with me topics you would like to see discussed and please join in the dialogue through the comment section. Your engagement makes the blog a much richer place to hang out!

    Thank you for joining me on this journey!!    

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Barb Klein
Inspired Possibility
585-705-8740
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