Inspired Possibility Blog

Getting Grounded

7/20/2021

Phew! It's been a doozy of a week for me - lots of dips into funks, times of abandoning myself, questioning myself, doubting myself, getting down on myself… for no particular reason that I can pinpoint, which is the worst kind of out of sorts for me! I like to at least understand what's going on.

I try to remember that we all have these funks and I've talked to a lot of people who seem to be riding these funk waves with me at this time, but knowing it's to be expected and I'm not alone helps only a little. Sometimes I am better at being with the discomfort of it, and other times I really just want it to stop… to go away!

I definitely know that the more I'm able to let things be as they are and not aggressively try to change them, the more quickly it will move on through.

I also know that when the inner turmoil is stirring it can be really unsettling, and at times we even feel shaken up, not grounded at all. So, the theme this week is getting grounded.

Getting Grounded:

One of the quickest ways to do this is to simply feel your feet on the floor (or barefeet on the earth if you can), feel your body being held by the seat, bed, or ground, let out a few audible sighs, maybe even imagining the stress or burden sliding right off your shoulders. Notice how your body wants to move. Does your neck want some gentle circles? Do you want to wiggle or stretch in any way? Let yourself move until you are just a little more comfortable. Find yourself in this moment - look around - what do you see? What do you hear? Who else is nearby? Are you safe here? (If not, please find a way to get to a place where you are).

If you're feeling super agitated, you might want to shake your hands and arms (and maybe even your feet and legs) as if you're shaking off whatever it is that's getting to you.

Feel your breath - notice its natural rhythm and quality in this moment without trying to change anything. With each breath invite your belly to soften. Place your hands on your lap or on your heart or on your belly… feel your own warmth and tender touch - this is a gesture of self-compassion. Let yourself know that you are here for you.

Allow yourself a little time to not need to DO anything or to figure anything out, but simply to be here with yourself. Take the time you need… Connecting with your breath and feeling your body. Support yourself to get into your body in this moment in time. If there is any gentle reassurance you want to offer to yourself, please do… things like, “I'm here… we've got this… I love you. We will get through this. Shhhh….” can be tried out. If you find a phrase that softens your body a bit, offer that to yourself - lean into it. Let the softness come.

Repeat as often as needed. I've needed it a lot lately. After I feel a little more grounded I've found it to be helpful to take note of what's true in this moment by either writing about “In this moment…” simply allowing my pen to move across the page about whatever is here right now for a few minutes or just saying aloud or silently to myself, “OK, in this moment…” This helps to bring a reality check to this moment, this time, and keeps me from running away with the thoughts that may be carrying me in 900 different directions at once. Right here. Right now. Be here now. (Sometimes I recite this simple phrase to myself with every inhale, exhale, and pause).

How do you get grounded? I'd love to hear - please share your ideas so that we can add to our available practices!

I've recorded this guided meditation to support you in getting grounded. I invite you to give yourself a few minutes and allow yourself this time to settle in to this moment.

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Our Need for R.E.S.T...

7/13/2021

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Coming back from a couple of days away with my husband, Tom, I am reminded how vital REST is to our spirits, bodies, minds, hearts, and nervous systems. While we were away our only goals were to rest, relax, have fun, and flow with our days.

Yesterday I spent the day reading, writing, and relaxing by the pool – dipping in when the sun got too hot, getting in the shade when I needed a break from the sun, and talking and laughing with Tom. We were lighthearted and delighted by the simplicity of the day. We did not allow work or phones to interrupt our time. We consciously chose to take this time together to enjoy life and one another. Summer is a great and easy time to do this as it seems to lend itself to it – there’s a collective energy of play, vacation, and lightness.

On our drive home we listened to a podcast with Broadway sensation, Lin-Manuel Miranda, a wildly creative man! He shared that much of his inspiration for his shows came when he was in a relaxed state – floating in a pool or on vacation. Of course, there’s much hard work involved in bringing what he creates to life, but there is also an opening for creativity that happens when he is in a state of rest.

I have experienced this myself and witnessed it in others – it may look like we’re procrastinating or not creating because there isn’t yet anything to show the world. But, in reality, when we slow down and give ourselves some spaciousness, our mind is free to dream, to imagine, to visualize and we are open to receive bursts of insight, inspiration, and artistry. Percolation time is a necessary precursor (at least for some of us) for spurts of creativity.

It struck me that we all have a deep need for rest, for so many reasons. As a society we are often rest-deprived, placing value on busy-ness and productivity over this restorative space that can feel like nothing is happening. What we miss is that often, something important is still going on even though there isn’t outer evidence or product to show. When we have time and space, we can access fresh perspectives for problem solving, and our imagination can dream up things that wouldn’t be possible if we forced them. When our nervous system can relax, we are not in a state of fight or flight, but rather receptivity, wonder, and openness. We are more likely to respond more thoughtfully than react mindlessly.

I offer you this way to look at REST:
R – Re-boot
E – Exit
S – Space
T – Time

Re-boot: Just as your computer or phone can get bogged down or frozen and needs to be powered down and then re-started, we too need periodic re-boots. Without taking a break, we become overly reactive, spinning (just like that annoying circle on your computer), going nowhere. Our nerves are frayed, we’re depleted and drained. We need to interrupt this spinning by stepping back from the habitual pace at which we move and the typical things we mindlessly do. We need to power down, unplug - choose to give ourselves an intentional break to refresh, rejuvenate, re-fuel, re-energize (so many great R words… I could go on forever, but I’ll spare you! You can add your own). This allows us to start up again with renewed energy, fresh perspective, a lighter heart.

Exit – Like a performer, sometimes we need to “exit stage left” from the center of our lives where all the activity is happening. Get out of the spotlight, step behind the curtain, take off the costume, mask, and makeup and just BE. Whether you step away for 3 minutes, 3 days, or 3 weeks, an intentional exit will give you a chance to re-boot.

Space – We need space in our lives – physical space, space in our schedule, distance from one another and time between activities. I was highly aware of this on our drive. I want several car lengths between me and the car ahead of me; I want to change lanes well before I need to make a turn and in a time when it’s safe to get over.

This tendency transfers to life for me. I don’t want to be squeezed into a tight space where I have to react without thinking, to feel pushed or rushed. In traffic or in daily life, these scenarios make me anxious. It’s easy to fill our schedules so tightly with calls or meetings that there is no room between meetings for a bathroom or meal break or even time to do the actual work. It’s even easier to fill our schedules so that there is no time available for the mini reboots (a quick walk outdoors, a conversation with a friend, a breath of fresh air or a day off), and we begin to feel an internal pressure of constraint and overwhelm. We need breathing room in our days in order to think clearly, be inspired or creative, show up to life’s challenges at the top of our game (or at least closer to it).

Time – We need time… time alone, time to move more slowly, time to breathe, time to connect and time to reflect. This goes very closely with space, as you can see. We need to allow ourselves more time than we think we need to get places and finish tasks!! How many of you are overly optimistic when it comes to those kinds of things? When we give ourselves time, we create the space which allows us to exit or step aside for a moment or more in order to re-boot.

How do you know when you need a REST?

What are your signals when it’s time for you to give yourself this critical R.E.S.T.? How does your body let you know? Your mind? Your heart? Your spirit? Learn to listen more closely for these internal signals so that you can respond with self-compassion and kindness. We want to be proactive in creating this time of R.E.S.T so that we don’t find ourselves “resting” with a headache, illness, or injury.

Taking time to re-boot, exit, and allow space and time will have a ripple effect! Not only do you benefit – the people in your life will thank you too! Give it a try and please let us know your thoughts and experiences here. How do you like to give yourself R.E.S.T.? What happens when you don’t? What’s your promise to yourself in terms of honoring this need in the next little while?

In need of a R.E.S.T? Join me on retreat...

If you're in need of some serious rest, please consider joining me, Sandra Sabene, and Carol Moon for this year's Let Your Light Shine Retreat, September 24-28th at the deeply restorative space that is Light on the Hill Retreat Center in the gorgeous Finger Lakes of Western NY! We have created this time to allow you lots of space and time to let down, to connect with your inner wisdom and inspiration, to renew and be deeply nourished physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually! Early bird registration closes July 31st!

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Everyday Beauty

6/1/2021

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This week I come to you with a simple, but not easy invitation. Slow down and notice the everyday beauty all around you. Pause to take in sights, sounds, scents. Cherish a sweet smile shared in passing with a stranger. Savor a conversation with a friend. Take your time as you enjoy the sweetness of a strawberry.

This practice pairs well with gratitude and it can completely shift our experience of life because it redirects our focus. Even in hard times, sad times, angry times, there is beauty to be found. The more we notice, the more often we remember to look. We soften and we begin to allow in “this too…” Even as my heart breaks, I can find the beauty in a flower offered with love. Even when it's a dark and gloomy day, there is a fleck of color that catches my eye.

Curious... What do you notice?
I'd love to hear about the beauty you notice as you move throughout your day. I'm also curious what shifts for you as you take time to look for it… to include it. Please share in the comments below!

This isn't about painting over anything painful or hard. It's about saying “this too…” This too is here. It isn't all good or all bad, all black or all white - there are so very many shades of color in between.

This week's meditation is “Everyday Beauty.” I invite you to join me in this practice as we slow down and become present… as we notice the beauty we might otherwise miss. May this practice fill you up.

If you've missed previous meditations, you can access my entire library for free at Soundcloud. I invite you to explore and see which practices would most support you this week.

A Beautiful Invitation for You:
Doors are open for my Soul Care group (which is a truly beautiful thing in itself) for the summer session which begins next Monday, June 7th. This is a group that comes together to focus on self-care and also nurturing and nourishing our souls so that they are filled up! We will be gathering every other week on Monday evenings from 7-8:30 PM EDT June - August. Email me to apply if you're interested in joining this group.

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What Would Love Do?

4/13/2021

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Each morning I set an intention for my day…a quality that I invite in to support me throughout the day. A guidepost that I can touch back in with when I remember.
One of my favorite and most powerful intentions is Love. It allows me to check in with it throughout the day, asking, “What would Love do?” before I react to a situation or sink into a particular story I'm telling myself.

Asking What would Love do? allows us to tune into the quality of love as a guiding force. Love reminds us to be gentle with ourselves and others, to act kindly and with compassion, remembering that we're all doing the best we can in this moment.

What does Love do?
Love listens…
Love sees you and hears you
Love comforts a hurting heart
Love softens loneliness
Love sits with a hurting friend without any need to fix or advise
Love gives from a generous place, without expectation
Love fills us up
Love sets boundaries that are clear but not harsh
Love says “yes” or “no” without apology
Love cultivates trust
Love cuddles the dog
Love patiently sets aside the to-do list and chooses to be present with another
Love puts the phone away
Love smiles at a stranger, holds a door, and lets the anxious driver cut in
Love feeds the birds
Love slows down to notice the beauty
Love appreciates what's here

What else??

I invite you to try it out today. When you find yourself reacting, pause… ask yourself, “What would Love do?” and notice how it changes your interactions, your perceptions, your perspective, and your day. Let us know by sharing in the comments!

The meditation I am sharing this week is one called “What Would Love Do?” I invite you to enjoy this practice as we begin by first extending this love to ourselves.

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Let's Lean into Nature

10/10/2020

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Let’s lean into nature’s wisdom and away from the fearfulness and reactivity of human nature. In nature there is an inherent understanding of the ever-changing nature of life – the seasons, days, cycles… they happen without thought or worry.

Seeds scatter everywhere – some will take root and flourish, while others will become food for some animal or nourishment for the soil. Acorns don’t strive to become the biggest, strongest, best oak tree in the forest. They simply hold their potential and allow it to break forth in the perfect time, in the perfect way.

Nature flows with the great mystery. It doesn’t need to know how or when things will work out.

Animals simply follow the rhythm of their ancestors, follow their inherent knowing about when to gather, move, hide, or attack. They don’t waste time on worry or hate.

In the wilderness, diversity is valued and appreciated. The multitude of trees and plants yield a variety of beauty that we cherish. Species are interdependent and interconnected, as are we if we would only pause long enough to feel into this truth. Can we learn to value the uniqueness each of us brings to this life? What would be possible if we operated with a solid understanding of our inter-relatedness?

At this very moment where I live, trees are shedding their lives, gathering their energy inward to move into a time of dormancy. They are letting go of the past season – allowing the old to fall away in preparation for what’s to come. Preparing for a time of rest and rooting before opening their branches to new growth in just a few months. What might you let go of to prepare you for fresh growth?

What would it be like if we could quiet the tendency to get busy and simply drop our roots into those things that nourish and nurture us so that we can stand strong and steady amidst the storms? What if we learn to bend and sway with the winds so that we don’t break in unyielding rigidity?

What might we learn from the forest? Mary Reynolds Thompson offers this wisdom from the forest (5 min. video) to support us as we deal with a global pandemic.

As Thompson says in her book, Reclaiming the Wild Soul: How Earth’s Landscapes Restore Us to Wholeness, “The wisdom you seek (in the forest) can be experienced but never possessed. Wild, ancient, primal, it moves through the shadows. The presence of such mystery and immensity is overwhelming. You may have to fight the urge to break the tension by running away. But, if you remain, at least for a while, things will happen. In this uncertain world, creativity flourishes.”

Can we cultivate the capacity to take a deep breath, stand still, and be in the present moment? Can we stop and feel the tension of wanting to do something and not knowing in this mysterious time?

What if we could simply learn to hold ourselves, knowing something new is growing and will emerge? Root, breathe, pay attention, and go deep within ourselves to feel for what is wanting to come forth naturally and organically, without force.

Can we allow the uncertainty to give birth to creativity? We are in a time where we need creative thinking, problem solving, and fresh ideas… and if we can only be still for a bit, we can allow space for those things to emerge from a place of intelligence that comes from deep within.

Please share your thoughts and reflections below.

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Pressure, Pause... and, Begin Again!

8/3/2020

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So many pressures are bearing down on us these days – maybe you’ve noticed!? I’m sure we each have our own flavor, our own personal pressures, and also the collective shared pressures from our country, world, society, and culture. It is a lot. I feel the weight of it… even though I have a great deal of flexibility in my schedule, a great deal of privilege in my life, and a lot of excellent practices to help support and sustain me.

Some pressures come in even from things that feel "good" or inviting… the call of a beautiful summer day to get outdoors and do all the things, use all the toys, do the outdoor work, etc… (you can read my poem, “The Pressure of a Beautiful, Perfect Summer Day” here for more about that).

People asking “What do you have planned for the weekend? What are you going to do?” It wasn’t until a friend texted and asked me “What aren’t you going to do this weekend?” that it hit me how conditioned we are to think that a “good weekend” is one that’s packed with activity, productivity, or a combination of both. We are not programmed to let down, and many of us struggle to even know how to relax.

Then there’s the internal pressure we apply on ourselves… I should be doing something. I’m lazy if I just sit here and read. What’s wrong with me? I know I need to… I have so many things on my list… ______ needs this from me…

Often when we do slow down and let ourselves pause or stop, even briefly, our body lets us know just how tired we are. If we are listening with kindness, compassion, and care, we might just give it a nap or an early bedtime, without judgment. Or we might just give ourselves a sweet time-out.

And then we can begin again… refreshed, renewed, with a brain that now has the ability to think creatively. When we go through this cycle of pressure, pause, begin again, actually allowing ourselves each of those phases, we may be surprised. We may notice that we feel clearer, stronger, and more energized as we face the things we need and want to do.

It takes a lot of awareness and it requires courage to add in the pause in a world that values “busy” and “productive…” I’m here to tell you, there are no gold medals for burning yourself out! No extra stars for pushing through when it’s going to leave you depleted. Abandoning yourself and your needs to do all the things or care for everyone else is not the way to go.

PAUSE...

Stop! Please. Listen to your sweet body, to your racing mind, your lonely heart, your frazzled spirit. What do they need and want?

Pause. Tune in. Listen. And, then honor what you hear by responding. This is the part we sometimes skip – we hear what is desperately needed, but we tell that part of ourselves to just wait or to shut up. Instead, I invite and encourage you to give yourself the same TLC you’d give your beloved child or your best friend. Do what you need to tend to your body, comfort your own heart, calm your mind, soothe your soul. Let your nervous system take a break before you ask it to get on to the next thing…

Then, after you’ve given yourself this little break, even if it is only for 5 minutes, begin again, with fresh energy, fresh life, feeling a little recharged. See if it makes a difference, and let us know by commenting below!

If you’d like to play with this idea, I invite you to join me and my dear friend and colleague, Carol Moon, from Yoga & Wellness with Carol, for a Mini Retreat – Begin Anew! this Friday, August 7 from 9-11:30 AM ET. It’s a great way to end your week, begin your weekend, and honor yourself with a little space for reflection, movement, and pause. It’s a chance to slow down, go within, and pause… It’s a re-set in a sweet and nourishing way. Join us. We’d love to welcome you into circle. If you want to hear a bit more about it, get a sense of us and what we’re creating, please watch this short video! And, if you have questions, please reach out.

Until our paths cross, I’m sending you so much love and wishing you the peace of a pause to balance the pressures of being human.

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What Do You Love?

5/8/2020

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Image by congerdesign from Pixabay

Now wait… before you read on,… pause.   Take a breath. Maybe close your eyes and put your hands on your heart. Get curious. With an open mind and an open heart, ask, with genuine interest… what do I love? Then see what rises up. Be willing to be surprised. What DO you love??

Recently I posed this question to a group of women who may not often think about this, particularly in the context I asked it. Also, I asked it in the middle of a global pandemic at a time when many of us are feeling weary, worried, unsettled, and uncertain. I asked moms of kids who struggle with substance use disorder –what do you love about your son or daughter? What are their best qualities?

Lots of women replied, naming so many beautiful qualities their kids embody, acknowledging that it’s been awhile since they’ve reflected on these aspects of kids who are often associated with pain and struggle. Which was exactly my point in asking the question. Not to pretend that the horrendous experiences aren’t there, but to remember that beneath this disease, there is still a loving, caring, kind, humorous, creative, generous being.

If there is a person in your life with whom you have a challenging or complicated relationship, you might take a moment to consider what qualities you love in this person.

Why am I asking you now at a time when there’s so much we don’t like, so much we are worried, scared, or discombobulated about??

I find it really helpful to remember that the whole messy mix can be true at the same time. It’s not all or nothing, black or white, good or bad. Rarely does life present itself in a neat package despite our mind’s desire to simplify it that way.

We look at what we love, not to erase or to pretend that the painful, uncomfortable, less desirable things aren’t also here. We do this to see that there’s room for it all. That it can ALL be here, at the same time, in the same reality, in the same heart. We don’t have to choose what we hate or what we love, what we’re for or what we’re against, what we want to lean into or what we want to eradicate forever. We can be with it all. You can love the sunshine and warmth, remembering that beach in your happy place, even as you cringe at the snow that is here when it shouldn’t be!

It’s a simple practice to wonder and to notice from time to time. And, so, I ask you, even in your sadness, despair, worry, or fear, to consider, remember or discover the part of you that loves.

Right now… consider, what do you love?

About yourself? What are your best qualities? (let's start here... and, if you go no further, that will be more than enough!)

About the situation you find yourself in?

About life?

About the person or people who challenge you deeply?

What do you love to do? Eat? Experience?

Who do you adore, and what is it about them that you love?

What do you love to be? Do? Have?

Feel into it with all of your senses – what images, thoughts, scents, feelings emerge? What brings a smile to your face or lights you up inside?

What brings a sweet “aaahhhh….?”

For me, a few things that come to mind right now that I love are sunsets; lakes and oceans; “The Grinch;” Snoopy; the smell of a bonfire or fresh-baked bread; sunshine and warm, fresh air; laughter; deep honest connections; the smell of a horse farm and feeling my body sway with a horse; and helping other people light up!

Now, let's be honest... it might be way easier to know what we don’t like, what we wish were different, even what we hate… And if that’s where your mind goes, then start there. When we’re deep in the muck, it can be hard to see out. Then, take a moment and look at the flip side. The opposite of what you hate is likely what you love or what you’re longing for.

Let it all be here. There is no need to jump over the uncomfortable, the painful, the sad or scary to get to the happy, peaceful, joyful feelings. We have the capacity to hold it all in these hearts of ours.

When we can touch in with what we love, we soften, if only for a moment. Something inside of us stirs.   We awaken maybe a long-forgotten spark. We connect with something deep and true.

From this place, maybe we allow ourselves to dream or desire. Or maybe we allow ourselves to simply accept someone else as they are, even with the parts we don’t like or wish weren’t there. Maybe for a minute we are able to see the essential goodness in another person. Maybe we energize ourselves enough to take that next step.

What do you love?

Feel into it. Awaken your heart. And, then please share in the comments and let’s sprinkle some love around today!

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The Invitation and Gift of This Day

4/19/2020

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I have been given this life and this day… let me not waste it on worry, fear, or dismay. Let me greet it as the gift it is and use it wisely – not feeding panic, anger, or judgment. Let me walk gently upon this earth, among these people, bringing love, kindness, and compassion. Let me take all of our well-being as a serious concern and act accordingly. Let me take care of myself, my family, and our home in a way that honors us and all beings. Let me be prepared – but not unreasonably so.
Let me take care of our needs without taking more than I need, leaving others with none.

The time for injustice, inequity, and inequality is over. The time to love and care for one another, for all beings, for the earth is here. Now. How will I respond to this moment? How will we, as a people, respond to this moment in time? How will we stay awake and not return to the mind-numb reality we have been in for far too long?

We can no longer be reckless with our lives, believing we exist as separate from others. No. We have been shown the depth and vastness of our coexistence and interdependence. There is a gift in that if we only remember. If only we respond wisely.

Now is not a time for folly or fight. Now is the time for us to come together, to rise together, to be better than we were before… not by possessing more or earning more or even doing more, but by caring more, by respecting one another more, by loving more. By choosing to look. To see. To respond to the devastation, we have caused to our earth, to our people, to all beings. We have to be brave enough to look and to see. And, then from there, choose and act.

We must not forget when this time seems to be over. We must allow ourselves to be changed in the best possible way by the devastation and destruction of today so that it has not been for naught. There is a gift in this day, and there is an invitation. How will we respond?

What thoughts or insights does this bring up for you? Please share in the comments.

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Go Gently... Please

4/3/2020

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Image by Pete Linforth from Pixabay

Now is a time to go gently with yourself and with others.   Now is the time for love, for generosity, for kindness and compassion – toward all beings, including you! It is the time to care deeply. It is NOT the time to judge, shame, or condemn others. I see the temptation and suspect it’s going to get stronger as we grow more impatient, frustrated, and weary. And so, I plead with you, please, please be gentle…

March 11th, just a little over 3 weeks ago, marks the day our world changed forever. It was not long ago at all and yet it feels like a lifetime ago… we got the call that morning telling us that the mighty Mom Klein had died. We visited our son (2 days before visits were shut down for the foreseeable future), grateful we could deliver this news in person and share our tears, love, and hugs. I went out to lunch with my sister at a local restaurant and enjoyed a nice meal, and probably another hug or two.

March 12th – with a growing sense of things quickly spinning into something unknown and foreign, I did a radio show with Lori and Keith from Recovery Coach University Radio. With a heightened sense of awareness, we did wipe all the equipment and surfaces with Clorox wipes and mostly kept our distance, but we didn’t yet get how serious this was. We joked about the toilet paper hoarding and shook our heads in confusion… and just to be safe, on the way home, I bought two packs. We affirmed and were relieved by my younger son’s decision to cancel his trip to Florida for Spring Break, even though he is young and healthy… already it felt like the unquestionably right call. Just days earlier I had told him I thought they’d be fine to go…

Things were changing and happening so rapidly and have been ever since. I feel like I’ve been caught in a whirlwind… internally and externally. A blur of news updates, of emails advising of extra precautions being taken which rapidly morphed into “We are closed until further notice…” Cancellations, closures, schools switching to online learning,… more and more erasures in the planner of all the trips, appointments, and events I had coming up. April went from one in which I would barely be home to one in which I will only be home, with no plans. Each day brings with it a swirl of thoughts and feelings as I try to magically predict when this will all be over, fall into despair, perk up at a story of goodness – living within the chaos of it all.

It’s a lot. We must be gentle.

There has been so much letting go… of classes, appointments, events, routines, regular support, fun times with others, contact with loved ones. And, in all this letting go, we are all feeling the weight of uncertainty. Those words “until further notice” land with a dark and ominous tone. They remind us that life is always uncertain – we just usually pretend it isn’t. Somehow it feels extra uncertain right now with so many things being disrupted all at once. The fear is palpable as this invisible antagonist sweeps around the world. As we take in the death tolls, we are faced with our own immortality and the truth that one day those we love will also die. We hope it won’t be alone.

We are ordered to shelter in place, to self-quarantine, or to PAUSE as our NY Governor has called it. For a moment we imagine all that we’ll get done in this time when busy-ness is taken away. But then we feel the weight of it all, and we are reminded of how exhausted we are and that stress takes a toll on everything. We are brought to our knees as we are forced to confront what is truly essential. To re-prioritize our lives – what really matters? Health. Relationships. Life. Love. Kindness. Compassion. Generosity.

All these free offerings?? They are oh so tempting to someone with Bright Shiny Object Syndrome, like moi! The urge to fill in all that usually coveted white space is strong, and I catch myself mindlessly signing up, saying “yes, please distract me from the here and now…” Nature abhors a vacuum, and apparently so do I. Until I reality check and realize my bandwidth is not as wide as my white space – it’s actually much, much less than before.

I remember to be gentle with myself.

I don’t need to do all the things – only those that will really nourish me. I only need to be on the calls with people and in groups that feel supportive. I can skip the rest. This might not be the time to learn a new skill or to focus on business. This might be a time when less really is more. I want to do more less!

Over the past few weeks it has been easy to let this ever-present concern consume us. It’s been easy to get obsessed even when we didn’t intend to. Even if you don’t watch the news (which I don’t generally), the news is everywhere…social media posts, headlines of breaking news at the top of my email inbox and within every single email that comes in it’s there… Coronavirus… COVID-19. We need to be informed, but we don't need to be flooded with input. It's too much to digest.

We see the inherent inter-connectedness of all beings and this both terrifies and empowers us. We are reminded that viruses don’t respect borders, oceans, or walls.

We find ourselves reeling as we ride the roller coaster of emotions in this human experience – feeling our own and the collective fear, overwhelm, sadness, dread, and grief while also being uplifted and inspired by the many acts of compassion, caring, kindness, love, and generosity. This time bringing out the best and the worst in us.

It’s a lot.

We come to realize that we are feeling more tired and less productive than we’d like – not an easy thing to accept in a culture used to driving, doing, achieving, producing, succeeding…   Suddenly we wonder what “succeeding” even means right now.

Now we realize that it’s nearly impossible to find motivation or create from a space of exhaustion and anxiety. So, we surrender to Netflix bingeing, earlier bedtimes, and longer nights of sleep.

This is our new normal, and it’s anything but “normal.” It changes moment by moment, and the only reasonable way to approach it is one moment at a time.

We feel the weirdness of endless disinfecting and keeping our hands from touching our faces. We feel the creepiness in the air as masked figures move together, but apart, averting gazes (as if we won’t really be there if we don’t look at one another), collectively holding our breath – together, but apart.

And we're reminded that in the empty streets what feels like the end of the world is also a reflection of our great act of love, our care and concern for others, our desire to be part of the solution.

It’s. A. LOT!

So, please… go gently into this next day. Into this next moment.

Take breaks – a lot of breaks. Get more rest than feels reasonable.

Offer tender loving care to your sweet self.

Say “yes” to the things that make you happy.

Bake the familiar goodies that comforted you as a child (Betty Crocker Blueberry Buckle for me today!).

Wear clothes and jewelry that feel good. Maybe wear things from places you’ve loved or concerts you’ve enjoyed (today I’m wearing my Albuquerque sweatshirt to mark that I should have been arriving there this afternoon).

Hug a tree. I’m pretty sure that’s still a safe thing to do!

Offer a loving smile to a stranger. Call a friend.

Extend love and compassion freely, often, and wherever you can, beginning with yourself.

Know that we will get through this.

Please.

Go gently… until further notice.

How are you going gently these days?? Please share in the comments below. We can learn from you.

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3 Reasons to Retreat

9/26/2019

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(originally posted 6/10/18)

There was a day when I didn't know about retreats and how powerful they are and what a critical piece of my well-being they would become I imagine there are others out there who also wonder... who haven't yet discovered the magic of retreat. So, I'd like to share with you just a few great reasons to give yourself the gift of retreat, for however long you may take or in whatever form! What are some of the benefits and why would anyone make the investment of time and energy to retreat for a bit?

1. Get out of routine - there's great value in simply breaking the pattern of everyday life - of taking yourself out of your usual habits and routines. By changing things up, we tap into wonder and curiosity about life. We begin to open to new ideas, insights, and creativity. We open our eyes to new perspectives. We see new possibility that we hadn't considered before. We lighten up, let go, and even have fun!! When you break away from the daily routine, there is nothing to fix or figure out. Your mind can truly rest. Aaahhhh... to me, that alone is worth the price of admission!

2. Slow down - We live in a world where go, go, go, is the norm. Demands are coming fast and furious and we find ourselves pulled in so many directions with no relief in sight. Our pace is unsustainable and our to-do list never-ending. But, we don't know how to stop sometimes. This pace is taking a toll on our health and well-being. When we slow down, we calm our mind and soothe the nervous system. Then we notice the beauty of nature, our own body, people in our world. We have to step off the hamster wheel to be with these sweeter things.

3. Quiet the outer noise - Oh my goodness! There is so much coming at us all the time - news, ads, social media, political banter... it's an endless onslaught of noise, opinions, and provocations. You've noticed that, right? Just taking a media break for a brief period of time is super healing and restorative. Imagine room to breathe without your phone constantly pinging in your ear. Step away and feel the sigh of relief and the sense of peace. In this space we begin to listen to our hearts and souls and hear our own inner guidance.

We don't need more intensity - the world brings plenty of that. We don't need more things to do - we have more activities than we can keep up with already. Retreat is designed to be restorative and nourishing.

Why do you retreat? Please join the conversation in the comments and let us know! Together we grow and learn!

Does retreat sound good to you? If you like this sound of this and would love to join a circle of like-minded women who are ready for a little of this retreat sweetness, join us for an upcoming retreat!

At my retreats, everything is an invitation. You are free to rest as needed. Explore the land as you commune with nature or give your body some movement among the trees and hills if that's your thing. Lean into time with yourself. And, rest into a world of no expectation.

I hold our retreat space as safe and sacred - in this space you need only show up for yourself. You are free to participate in the way that's comfortable for you and you are free to share and listen knowing that this is a zone where there is no advising, no figuring out what anyone else "should" do, and no worry that anyone is going to tell you what you should do. This is a place and space to deepen your connection with yourself and to learn to honor yourself more deeply than ever before.

Questions? Let me know! Know someone who would love this? Please share this with them! And, if you're ready to jump on board, you can register here!

"A women's retreat springs from and is about stepping out of your ordinary existence to listen and attune to your truest, most authentic self... It is setting apart time to tend the hearth of your inner life, feed your muse, reclaim your dreams." ~ Jennifer Louden, The Women's Retreat Book

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Getting Grounded

Our Need for R.E.S.T...

Everyday Beauty

What Would Love Do?

Let's Lean into Nature

Pressure, Pause... and, Begin Again!

What Do You Love?

The Invitation and Gift of This Day

Go Gently... Please

3 Reasons to Retreat

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