Inspired Possibility Blog

Finding Stillness

4/11/2023

Often, we move through the ocean of life as if we’re riding the surface - tossed around, bobbing and rocking with every wave. We may be floating safely enough, but in this constant churning, we’re also thrown about by life, by people, responsibilities, and demands that pull on us. We are tossed and turned - at the mercy of things outside of our control.

Yet, beneath the crashing waves, the dark depths of the ocean offer a place of profound stillness, some distance from the surface turbulence. Similarly, deep within each of us, at the core, there is stillness available. The trick is to find it. Once we’ve found it, we only need to return there, time and again.

In this space, receive and allow yourself to be nourished and fed. Life continues at its frenetic pace, but you can find your own agency within it. In this space, feel both your separateness and your connection with others - not splitting off, but coexisting, maintaining your own steadiness, even in the waves. We become fluid ourselves as we flow with life a bit more smoothly, grounded and solid in the knowing, the sensation of our own body.

In the Stillness
In the stillness
the answers come,
truths are unearthed,
promises remembered.

In the stillness
prayers are answered,
hearts are restored,
dreams fostered,
visions captured.

In the stillness
the oneness becomes clear,
connection to self deepens,
universal threads intertwine.

In the stillness
the magic lies
waiting for you to visit
and reside here,
for however many moments.

© Barb Klein, 2016, from 111 Invitations: Step into the Full Richness of Life

What do you think? What does stillness offer you? What might become possible or evident if you took the time to find some quiet, some space?

Lao Tzu asks, “Do you have the patience to wait
                            Till your mind settles and the water is clear?
                            Can you remain unmoving
                            Till the right action arises by itself?”

Such a great and powerful reminder to get out of the chaotic spin, the tendency to react and jump into action without even having fully formed thoughts or ideas about what would be wise, skillful, or helpful to you, to the other, or to the situation.

Patience - they say it’s a virtue, and I suppose that’s true. Yet when we’re confronted with urgency, it can be terribly hard to access. Taking a pause. Finding our place of internal stillness helps.

What helps us get to that rich place of stillness? Pausing. Gathering ourselves up in our own loving presence. Granting ourselves grace, stepping back, stepping away before needing to take any action at all. Remembering that rarely anything good comes from the instantaneous fight, flight, freeze, or facade response.

It’s far better to slow things down, find our bearings by finding ourselves in this moment - take stock through our senses. Notice what we see, hear, smell, taste, and feel in this space. Awareness anchors us into the present moment. In that moment we can find and claim the stillness, remembering that even in a hurricane, there is the center of the storm, the eye that is relatively untouched by the raging winds. When the storms of life are raging, take yourself to the eye. Find yourself standing firm in the strength of who you are… not rigid, but strong and supple, able to bend and flow as the willow does. Bending, but not breaking because you are allowing the storm to happen around you, choosing not to step into it or resist it.

In the stillness, close your eyes, touch your heart, and ask the most important question: What do I need in this moment? Allow yourself permission to ask, knowing that your needs matter. Allow the answers to come. Allow yourself to hear, even if it’s uncomfortable. And then, from this grounded stance, begin to get curious about the ways you might be able to tend to whatever needs arise. What could you try? Who could you ask for help? What can you let go of? Is there anything here that is not yours? What can you turn over to someone else or to God or the Universe? Are you trying to carry too much? What can you put down, dear one?

In the stillness, take stock again. What do you see, hear, feel, taste, and smell now? Have your senses opened? Perhaps now you hear the bird song that wasn’t there in the crashing waves of panic. Maybe your eyes have softened to notice the yellow wren swinging on the feeder or the warmth of your lamp or even the light within the mostly grey sky. Maybe your heart and breath have slowed a bit. Maybe. Maybe not. What’s true for you?

The stillness offers us, invites us, into intimacy with our heart and soul. The stillness washes over us, enveloping us like a warm bath. The stillness opens our hearts and minds to fresh possibility - to see what wasn’t there before. To try something maybe we’ve never done before. Stillness offers spacious room to breathe, to stretch, to grow.

Stillness reminds us we do not have to rush, and that when we let go of the rushing, we are far better equipped to face whatever challenges await. It doesn’t take long for this medicine to work its magic. For it’s not really magic at all. It is the natural way of being - the essence of who we are. All the outer busyness and craziness - that’s conditioning, learned behavior from our society. The sense that we must be on or available all the time, that we must respond in an instant - that’s nonsense. It makes no sense except when there is an immediate danger, which is fairly rare.

There’s almost always more time than we think, and if we allow ourselves even a few moments of pause, of quiet, of stillness, what will emerge is so much richer, wiser, skillful, effective, supportive, helpful. So much more likely to be grounded in who we are and what we believe in. So much more aligned with what really matters to us. So much more likely to lead to fewer mistake and fewer regrets.

Let’s dive beneath the surface to tap into this deep anchoring of still, quiet nourishment. Imagine what could be if we all did that a little more often. Imagine a world grounded in stillness before action.

Please enjoy Leah Kent's beautiful guided meditation, Anchored Stillness, as a support toward finding your own stillness in this moment.   Leah Kent is a book coach and author who helps wisdom keepers and visionaries write and publish transformational books about their work in the world. She’s the creator of the Wild Embodied Writing method, and the author of Awakening the Visionary Voice. To learn more, visit leahkent.net or connect with Leah on Instagram @leahkentco

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Enchantment

11/1/2022

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Autumn Trees

Last time I wrote on September 7th, it was from a place of stillness…that magical place of contemplation and inner reflection. It was right before I went into the studio to record 111 Invitations audio book! I am thrilled to let you know that it is now finished and became available on Audible on October 19th (the anniversary of my Mama's passing)!! It feels really good to bring to completion a project I've dreamt of for about 6 years! Sometimes these things take time. How cool that this post is going up on 11-1!?

Sometimes it's a matter of finding the right people or allowing enchantment and magic to do their thing… in this case, I had no idea who could help me, how much something like this would cost, if I even had the rights to do it, etc… then all of a sudden, I connected with just the right person (Jennifer Collins - more about her later) who connected me with another “just right” person - Linda Mazur (also more about her in a bit - the 3 of us, plus Linda's husband, Jack, are cooking up some special goodness in November which we hope you'll join us for! Keep scrolling for all the details!).

Both of them connected me with Scott Fitzgerald of RocVox Recording (who I already sort of knew about because he records another friend's podcast…) and things came together super easily and super quickly! The studio location? Um, the very same office space where I held my very first Discovering A New Life Direction workshop many moons ago! I love those times of synchronicity, flow, ease, allowing things to unfold and come together with just the right amount of effort but very little force!

There’s a little touch of enchantment in that! “Enchantment…” a word that has awakened and enlivened me since Liz Gilbert offered an opportunity to know our enchantment in a virtual retreat. She shared that enchantment is the part of you that likes things… it’s where you get that warm, yummy feeling inside. Things like warm cinnamon vanilla pudding or a double rainbow or a baby’s giggle are laced with enchantment. Enchantment lives in each of us…

In a time of so much disenchantment it’s more important than ever that we find ways to connect with this vibrant energy. That we ask it to tell us what it likes, what it hates, who it wants to be around and what it hopes we never do again. Liz invited us each to write a letter to ourselves from our enchantment using the prompt “Dear _______, I am your enchantment and this is what I want to tell you.”

In 5 minutes, I had a letter that let me know so many truths about what I’m longing for, what I need more of in my life, what I need to let go of. For those who know me, you know I am captivated by sunsets on a daily basis… doesn’t matter that they happen ever day. They take my breath away. Same with full moons, golden leaves, puppy dogs, and hot fresh-baked cinnamon fried cakes! My enchantment loves to dance and sit by the fire. She loves being with people I love and making time for deep connections and playful ones too. She hates when I overwhelm my schedule with too many things or when I compare myself to others.

As other people in the group shared their letters, we heard common themes and saw that enchantment doesn’t cost millions of dollars or require a lot of time. It only requires that we stop to notice… it often lies in simple things like nature or other people. It exudes beauty. It’s readily accessible. It awakens our spirit and carries hope. It lives in fun and play.

Since that day in mid-September, I have added a bit of communing with enchantment each day in my morning journaling. I ask it what it’s got for me today. I notice my interactions with it are more playful than even my gratitude or when I was asking Love what it would have me know. With enchantment it’s more of a light-hearted banter. She reminds me to lighten up and not take things too seriously, while also encouraging me not to miss the most precious moments. I’ve turned to her on hard, sad days to see how she might accompany me even then. She reminds me what matters most and to not be too hard on myself.

She often reminds me, “Have fun! Don’t take it or yourself too seriously! Play with it! Have fun with it! Let me dance through it… let inspiration come…” On particularly hard days she holds me with “Be brave. Stand up for you. Don’t back down or hurt yourself to make someone else happy. Not for one minute. Don’t do it! Do not abandon yourself! Let yourself breathe and live and be who you are. Claim your life. Claim your joy. Love yourself.” Another time she offered, “Thank you for finding me again. I want to play with you. Bring me into everything - let me be a guiding light. It's so much more fun that way! Let me lighten up the dark and heavy times and add sparkle and juice to the fun ones!” She’s pretty wise, very loving, and has a great sense of humor!

My invitation to you:
Give it a try! I invite you to take 5 minutes and write yourself a letter from your enchantment. Start with Dear____ and see what enchantment would call you (it might be a playful nickname!), I am your enchantment and I want to tell you… See what it likes, what it hates, who it wants to be around and with whom it doesn’t feel it can come out at all.

Let this energy enliven your days and ways. I could feel it coursing through my veins for about a month til I lost touch with it a little in the daily grind. I’m re-connecting now and am very grateful to do so! I invite you to let enchantment light up your days.

Meditation
Our meditation this week, Autumnal Walk Guided Meditation, is led by guest meditator, Laura Gavigan, Founder of Mindful Matters in Rochester, NY. It is the perfect accompaniment for theme. Laura guides us on a sensory-rich autumn walk. I hope you enjoy it and that it brings you the peace and calm it brought to me.

My SoundCloud library has a wide variety of meditations - check it out and see which ones call to you.

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In the Stillness

9/7/2022

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Waking one morning recently, a beautiful stillness enveloped me. The space embodied something between fully asleep and fully awake. No one moved. No thoughts stirred. No voices or traffic interrupted this bliss. A soft rain fell, amplifying the silence.

Such a beautiful way to enter the day – blissful, almost mystical. Beyond words. Before moving with intention to alleviate the ache in my hip, allowing myself to savor the relative silence. The silence within comforting and soothing my whole being. Feeling open…expansive… receptive. Ready to receive the unfolding of the day. Appreciative of this time before the happenings of the day, the week rush in on me.

Stillness – a solitary momentary sanctuary for the whole being – space for the soul to rest and abide. In this place there is nothing to figure out. Nothing to do. Only to BE. Deep peace, deep contentment wash over me as I feel alive, but gentle. Not activated.

Strong satisfaction here – I can take in and appreciate the beauty of our home, the sweetness of the space we have created. The serenity of this space. I breathe it in. I love this space. It reflects me. It holds and supports us well. I am content here. My soul is happy here. My creativity thrives here.

Today I simply receive this gift. And know that it is enough.

In the Stillness

In the stillness
the answers come,
truths are unearthed,
promises remembered.

In the stillness
prayers are answered,
hearts are restored,
dreams fostered,
visions captured.

In the stillness
the oneness becomes clear,
connection to self deepens,
universal threads intertwine.

In the stillness
the magic lies
waiting for you to visit
and reside here,
for however many moments.

© Barb Klein, 2016, from 111 Invitations: Step into the Full Richness of Life

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Lessons, Legacy, and Lightness...

12/7/2021

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It’s been a week… a week of BIG lessons, of reflecting on legacy, and of weaving lightness into it all (thanks to a friend reminding me of that one!). Much of this came from being on retreat with a beautiful group of wise, loving, vulnerable, courageous, and open-hearted women. Being in community like that seems to draw out deeper insights and wisdom than what I could discover on my own. Sharing silence, sharing meals, sharing practices like meditation, yoga, and Tai Chi somehow deepens and enhances them. And, retreat has a magic of its own… it works on us in its own way, for sure!

Lessons learned:

Sharing the load, whether it’s work or pain is a beautiful opportunity that brings deep relief and enriches everyone
We all carry pain, grief, and unimaginable turns of events in our lives. We do not have to carry our pain alone when we can find people we trust. Comparing our stories or circumstances to anyone else’s can silence us and lead us to stuff what we’re feeling, and that’s just not helpful. Our pain is valid too. Stuffing it or holding it in silence is unsustainable – find someone you trust to share a bit with.
Same with our dreams – we don’t have to hold them alone in silence. When we can find people with “believing eyes” as Sonia Choquette calls them, our dreams, hopes, and visions get infused with a fresh energy! And, there’s no point in comparing our dreams to anyone else’s. You’re not here to live out anyone’s ideas and purpose other than your own!
Laughter is good for the soul. Right!? You already knew that! It’s especially good when the world feels so heavy. Go ahead… have a great belly laugh as soon as you can!
We all want to be seen and heard. To know that we matter, at least to one other being. We have no idea who’s listening or who we’re reaching simply by being who we are. Trust me. You matter.
When we share our stories, our sadness, our regrets, our hopes, and our visions, we give others permission to do the same. Also, as we listen to others, we find more threads of commonality than we could have imagined. We can relate on a heart level to one another’s joys, hopes, sadness, fear, and grief and marvel at our interconnection.
Opening our hearts softens us. Compassion and love are limitless. And, it’s in our softness that we find our true power – not from muscling through, pushing on, or forcing things, but from relaxing and allowing ourselves a willingness to hear and feel what feels right and true for us.
We are often much better at knowing what others need and caring for them than we are at knowing what we need and how to care for ourselves. But, as we learn to turn our TLC toward ourselves, allowing ourselves to be filled up and nourished, everyone benefits.
We are also much better at seeing other people’s gifts while we are so often blind to our own. We extend them generosity, grace, and permission that we deny ourselves. We invite them to share their insights and creativity, and too often we hold back our own.
People are WEARY! There is too much noise out there right now. Our bodies need rest, our minds need rest, our souls need rest, and our hearts need rest. They also need quiet in order to have the space to hear inner wisdom, to tap into creativity, to gain fresh perspective, or to consider a new possibility. And, we all need to feel connection and love.
Silence is the secret sauce that opens hearts, sets souls free, and invites us to hear the wisdom of our own whisperings.
Sometimes our isolation is self-imposed. We may have set up walls or hidden away for one reason or another. The good news is that we hold the key to setting ourselves free!
We too often suffer silently while others are oh so willing to extend a hand, offer a hug, sit and simply listen, or allow you to delegate a piece of the work to them.
No one needs fixing, saving, or advising! They may need a sounding board. They may need to hear themselves talk something through. They might even ask for suggestions, but most often when given space and time, they are able to tap into their own guidance and wisdom and find the ideas and answers that suit them.
Challenging our assumptions and beliefs is a valuable and worthwhile exercise. When we think we know for certain, it is worth pausing and asking, “Am I sure that this is true?” Particularly when what we are thinking is that we are unwelcome, unworthy, undeserving, unacceptable, or un-anything…
When we show up and get out of our own way, beautiful things can happen!
Listen more than you talk. Give your attention… and speak when your heart compels you to (there’s usually something that someone needs to hear when we come from this place).

I’m reading a great book now called More Time to Think by Nancy Kline, and in it she clarifies “Listening to reply is (very) different than listening to ignite.” Oh yes! Listen… take in this being who’s sharing with you. Listen with your whole being. Listen without waiting to add your thoughts, and when you are inspired to respond (from that heart-centered place), do so in a way that inspires something within them!

From Cathy Dasson, yoga teacher and yoga therapist extraordinaire (who offered this beautiful yoga nidra a few weeks ago): “Do what you need. Nothing more. Effortless effort. You’re amazing when you soften!”
And, declare out loud and preferable with joyful dance, I AM HERE! (Thank you, Pink, for this amazing song! We had a lot of fun letting ourselves break free with it this weekend!).
Let delight enter your days! Embrace who you were born to be while you let go of the ideas of who you’ve imagined yourself to be, and claim the life you are here to live!
Legacy can be thought of as simply asking how you want people to feel for having known you or been in your presence. What do you hope they will say about you when you’re gone? What core qualities do you want to spread? These can be your North Star that guides everything you do, from work to friendships to family relationships. These qualities are the magic recipe that make up you! They are irreplicable for there is only one you walking this earth at this time.

So, that’s a bit of what I’ve learned this past week! You most certainly don’t need my permission, but I’m going to offer it anyway in hopes that it will encourage you to find your own “permission granted” statements. Permission granted to let others help you carry your burden or struggle. Permission granted to ask for and receive support (I promise you it gets easier as you do it more often, even if it’s wickedly uncomfortable at first! It sure was for me!!). Permission granted to acknowledge your needs, your longings, your desires, wishes, and hopes, and to ask for what YOU need! Permission granted to be you!!

What resonates with you? What would you question, disagree with or push back on?

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Our Need for R.E.S.T...

7/13/2021

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Coming back from a couple of days away with my husband, Tom, I am reminded how vital REST is to our spirits, bodies, minds, hearts, and nervous systems. While we were away our only goals were to rest, relax, have fun, and flow with our days.

Yesterday I spent the day reading, writing, and relaxing by the pool – dipping in when the sun got too hot, getting in the shade when I needed a break from the sun, and talking and laughing with Tom. We were lighthearted and delighted by the simplicity of the day. We did not allow work or phones to interrupt our time. We consciously chose to take this time together to enjoy life and one another. Summer is a great and easy time to do this as it seems to lend itself to it – there’s a collective energy of play, vacation, and lightness.

On our drive home we listened to a podcast with Broadway sensation, Lin-Manuel Miranda, a wildly creative man! He shared that much of his inspiration for his shows came when he was in a relaxed state – floating in a pool or on vacation. Of course, there’s much hard work involved in bringing what he creates to life, but there is also an opening for creativity that happens when he is in a state of rest.

I have experienced this myself and witnessed it in others – it may look like we’re procrastinating or not creating because there isn’t yet anything to show the world. But, in reality, when we slow down and give ourselves some spaciousness, our mind is free to dream, to imagine, to visualize and we are open to receive bursts of insight, inspiration, and artistry. Percolation time is a necessary precursor (at least for some of us) for spurts of creativity.

It struck me that we all have a deep need for rest, for so many reasons. As a society we are often rest-deprived, placing value on busy-ness and productivity over this restorative space that can feel like nothing is happening. What we miss is that often, something important is still going on even though there isn’t outer evidence or product to show. When we have time and space, we can access fresh perspectives for problem solving, and our imagination can dream up things that wouldn’t be possible if we forced them. When our nervous system can relax, we are not in a state of fight or flight, but rather receptivity, wonder, and openness. We are more likely to respond more thoughtfully than react mindlessly.

I offer you this way to look at REST:
R – Re-boot
E – Exit
S – Space
T – Time

Re-boot: Just as your computer or phone can get bogged down or frozen and needs to be powered down and then re-started, we too need periodic re-boots. Without taking a break, we become overly reactive, spinning (just like that annoying circle on your computer), going nowhere. Our nerves are frayed, we’re depleted and drained. We need to interrupt this spinning by stepping back from the habitual pace at which we move and the typical things we mindlessly do. We need to power down, unplug - choose to give ourselves an intentional break to refresh, rejuvenate, re-fuel, re-energize (so many great R words… I could go on forever, but I’ll spare you! You can add your own). This allows us to start up again with renewed energy, fresh perspective, a lighter heart.

Exit – Like a performer, sometimes we need to “exit stage left” from the center of our lives where all the activity is happening. Get out of the spotlight, step behind the curtain, take off the costume, mask, and makeup and just BE. Whether you step away for 3 minutes, 3 days, or 3 weeks, an intentional exit will give you a chance to re-boot.

Space – We need space in our lives – physical space, space in our schedule, distance from one another and time between activities. I was highly aware of this on our drive. I want several car lengths between me and the car ahead of me; I want to change lanes well before I need to make a turn and in a time when it’s safe to get over.

This tendency transfers to life for me. I don’t want to be squeezed into a tight space where I have to react without thinking, to feel pushed or rushed. In traffic or in daily life, these scenarios make me anxious. It’s easy to fill our schedules so tightly with calls or meetings that there is no room between meetings for a bathroom or meal break or even time to do the actual work. It’s even easier to fill our schedules so that there is no time available for the mini reboots (a quick walk outdoors, a conversation with a friend, a breath of fresh air or a day off), and we begin to feel an internal pressure of constraint and overwhelm. We need breathing room in our days in order to think clearly, be inspired or creative, show up to life’s challenges at the top of our game (or at least closer to it).

Time – We need time… time alone, time to move more slowly, time to breathe, time to connect and time to reflect. This goes very closely with space, as you can see. We need to allow ourselves more time than we think we need to get places and finish tasks!! How many of you are overly optimistic when it comes to those kinds of things? When we give ourselves time, we create the space which allows us to exit or step aside for a moment or more in order to re-boot.

How do you know when you need a REST?

What are your signals when it’s time for you to give yourself this critical R.E.S.T.? How does your body let you know? Your mind? Your heart? Your spirit? Learn to listen more closely for these internal signals so that you can respond with self-compassion and kindness. We want to be proactive in creating this time of R.E.S.T so that we don’t find ourselves “resting” with a headache, illness, or injury.

Taking time to re-boot, exit, and allow space and time will have a ripple effect! Not only do you benefit – the people in your life will thank you too! Give it a try and please let us know your thoughts and experiences here. How do you like to give yourself R.E.S.T.? What happens when you don’t? What’s your promise to yourself in terms of honoring this need in the next little while?

In need of a R.E.S.T? Join me on retreat...

If you're in need of some serious rest, please consider joining me, Sandra Sabene, and Carol Moon for this year's Let Your Light Shine Retreat, September 24-28th at the deeply restorative space that is Light on the Hill Retreat Center in the gorgeous Finger Lakes of Western NY! We have created this time to allow you lots of space and time to let down, to connect with your inner wisdom and inspiration, to renew and be deeply nourished physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually! Early bird registration closes July 31st!

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Grace

11/8/2020

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I’ve been pondering “grace” as we move toward our Virtual Mini Retreat on the 11th, Finding Grace. I wonder if it may be slightly mis-named, as I think grace may be unfindable. Grace finds you.

What is grace? It is not those words we rotely recited at dinner as a child (or maybe, for you, it is).

You can witness it, experience it, feel it, but it seems to be beyond words. It’s not something you work at, but rather an ethereal quality that enters into both beautiful and troubling moments of life. There is an opening to grace, an allowing that happens.

Grace is present in the pre-dawn hours when a mother sits in the dark, gently rocking her sweet sleeping baby. Grace is present in the soft kiss on the brow of a dying loved one. Grace enters in and carries us in the moments we don’t lose it in the midst of rage and confusion – when instead we are able to stand steady and face whatever is here. When we are able to be clear, confident, and compassionate, even as our voice quakes and our whole being shakes.

Grace is a Divine presence that encircles us when we come together in times of fierce and gentle love. Grace holds us when we surrender and allow ourselves to be led. Grace is also present in the strong actions of protest against injustice and wrong-doing. When we find the courage to stand up and face our oppressor, and say “no more” in a clear and unwavering stance, grace surely stands by our side.

Grace is witnessed in the silent prancing of the deer, the smooth flight of the seagull, the head toss of a frolicking horse. In the breath-taking performance of a ballerina or a singer taken over by a mighty force from within. Those moments that leave you breathless. I think grace is present there.

So, how do we “find grace?” We quiet our minds. We slow down our busy selves. We open our hearts and our eyes to notice. We breathe softly. We listen deeply. We love fiercely.

Grace is in the magic of the rising and setting sun, the changing of the leaves to orange, yellow, and red, in the delicate uniqueness of the snowflake. Grace can be soft, and it can also be fierce.

Grace is in the miracle of lives spared in unimaginably treacherous situations. It is in the reuniting of lost loved ones. It is in the protection of the imprisoned as they find their way home. Grace finds us and opens us if we allow it.

Grace is in the language of the poet, the flow of the dance, the stroke of the artist’s brush, the gentleness of the breeze, and the reflection of the still pond.

For something that is beyond words, I’ve just found a lot… after all, grace is worthy of our curiosity, our exploration, our inquiry. Grace deserves to have us sit with her and feel her softness and her strength in the beating of our heart, the pulsing of our veins. Grace is a life force energy all its own.

We will not see it in the blustering of an enraged person or in one driven by fear or vengeance. Does grace exist in fear? I don’t know, but I do know it can glide in as a balm if we allow it.

Grace is admitting when the fight is over and walking away. Grace is embodied in acceptance, and it walks hand in hand with dignity. Grace is woven into the tapestry of healing and recovery. Grace is in the eyes of the one who can look beneath the surface, into the heart and soul of another, and see the essential goodness.

Grace is in extending compassion to those who have hurt you. It slips into the dark places of pain to say, “May I begin to forgive you in order to release my soul from the agony of so much anger, hatred, and blame.” Grace says, “I’m sorry. I was wrong. I didn’t mean to hurt you. Please forgive me.” Grace loves when it seems unreasonable, and grace also holds the boundary that says, I love me too, and this I cannot/will not endure any longer.

Grace will guide us when we ask to be led to it. In the quiet still moments, ask. What do you find? Invite it in. Let it hold you in troubling times. What do you feel? It is worthy of noticing.

For me, this simple exploration has softened me. It has slowed my entire being. It has calmed each cell in this body and soothed my racing mind.

Grace holds fiercely, but lightly, what she stands for. Grace is Divine. It cannot be defined, for words limit its boundlessness, but it can most certainly be felt and seen.

It is the sparkle in the darkest of times that whispers, “We will be ok. We will be ok. We are ok. We are stronger than we think, and we will get through, but not by kicking and screaming and forcing things to go away. We will be ok when we accept and allow, and show up to follow our guidance. We will be ok.”

Thoughts? I invite you to sit with the idea of grace. What comes up for you? Please share.

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Let's Lean into Nature

10/10/2020

4 Comments

Let’s lean into nature’s wisdom and away from the fearfulness and reactivity of human nature. In nature there is an inherent understanding of the ever-changing nature of life – the seasons, days, cycles… they happen without thought or worry.

Seeds scatter everywhere – some will take root and flourish, while others will become food for some animal or nourishment for the soil. Acorns don’t strive to become the biggest, strongest, best oak tree in the forest. They simply hold their potential and allow it to break forth in the perfect time, in the perfect way.

Nature flows with the great mystery. It doesn’t need to know how or when things will work out.

Animals simply follow the rhythm of their ancestors, follow their inherent knowing about when to gather, move, hide, or attack. They don’t waste time on worry or hate.

In the wilderness, diversity is valued and appreciated. The multitude of trees and plants yield a variety of beauty that we cherish. Species are interdependent and interconnected, as are we if we would only pause long enough to feel into this truth. Can we learn to value the uniqueness each of us brings to this life? What would be possible if we operated with a solid understanding of our inter-relatedness?

At this very moment where I live, trees are shedding their lives, gathering their energy inward to move into a time of dormancy. They are letting go of the past season – allowing the old to fall away in preparation for what’s to come. Preparing for a time of rest and rooting before opening their branches to new growth in just a few months. What might you let go of to prepare you for fresh growth?

What would it be like if we could quiet the tendency to get busy and simply drop our roots into those things that nourish and nurture us so that we can stand strong and steady amidst the storms? What if we learn to bend and sway with the winds so that we don’t break in unyielding rigidity?

What might we learn from the forest? Mary Reynolds Thompson offers this wisdom from the forest (5 min. video) to support us as we deal with a global pandemic.

As Thompson says in her book, Reclaiming the Wild Soul: How Earth’s Landscapes Restore Us to Wholeness, “The wisdom you seek (in the forest) can be experienced but never possessed. Wild, ancient, primal, it moves through the shadows. The presence of such mystery and immensity is overwhelming. You may have to fight the urge to break the tension by running away. But, if you remain, at least for a while, things will happen. In this uncertain world, creativity flourishes.”

Can we cultivate the capacity to take a deep breath, stand still, and be in the present moment? Can we stop and feel the tension of wanting to do something and not knowing in this mysterious time?

What if we could simply learn to hold ourselves, knowing something new is growing and will emerge? Root, breathe, pay attention, and go deep within ourselves to feel for what is wanting to come forth naturally and organically, without force.

Can we allow the uncertainty to give birth to creativity? We are in a time where we need creative thinking, problem solving, and fresh ideas… and if we can only be still for a bit, we can allow space for those things to emerge from a place of intelligence that comes from deep within.

Please share your thoughts and reflections below.

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An Invitation to Reflect as You Move Forward

6/13/2020

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In the past 3 months, our world and our lives have changed in epic and unprecedented ways. There is no "going back" to anything. We can only move forward into a new chapter.  As we do, we each have the opportunity right now to pause, to reflect, to choose who we want to become, to choose what role we want to play in the new story.

We don't know what the future holds - ever - though it certainly feels more true right now than ever before. This can feel super unsettling. There is no road-map for us to follow as we step forward. We crave certainty, and yet we find time and again that the only certainty is that things will change.

So, now what? I invite you to spend some time with these questions... reflecting, sitting with them, and maybe journaling about any that interest you. Give yourself a few minutes of free writing - allow your pen to keep moving across the page without stopping so that you can tap beneath the surface and find your way to deeper insights. How long you write on any question is up to you, but you might try starting with 3 minutes and see what emerges.

We will be best able to step into the world in a grounded way when we have taken the time to get centered in ourselves. Important wisdom will come from within and beyond - a wisdom that can best be accessed in the quiet moments of a pause and reflect.

Offer yourself this gift. Take a moment to center yourself. Take a few deep breaths. Close your eyes. Maybe put your hands on your heart and earnestly consider these questions:

In the past 3 months...
1. What have you learned about yourself?

2. What have you learned about life and our world?

3. What has revealed itself as important to you?

4. What are you ready or willing to leave behind? What does not serve you? What no longer feels as important as it once did? What old beliefs or stories are ready to be discarded?

5. What would you like to carry forward? What has emerged during this time as something you don't want to forget about, take for granted, or stop doing?

6. What do you want to remember so that you don't go back to sleep, trying to "go back to normal?" It's so easy to slip back into old patterns, habits, and ways of thinking. Taking the time to reflect on this question and write out your answers will help keep you connected to any new insights you've had.

7. What is essential to you? What are your true priorities? What really matters? A friend recently noted, "We only get so many heartbeats." Let's let our moments and lives reflect our values, our desires, our priorities.

As we step into this next chapter:
8.Who do you want to become? You might reflect on this in terms of "I want to become someone who..." paying particular attention to the qualities you'd like to cultivate, the values you'd like to embody and reflect in your words and actions.

9. What is your vision for a better future for your kids, grandkids and their grandkids? Paint a picture of the future life you imagine, thinking about humanity, our planet, how we interact with one another... whatever comes up for you as important.

10. What commitments will you make right now to be part of a better tomorrow? For yourself, for your family, your community, your country, other people, animals, and the planet.

11. Knowing that you are no good to yourself, to anyone else, or to any cause that you care about unless you take good care of yourself, what promise will you make to yourself right now regarding your own self-care? Think about your body, mind, heart, and spirit as you consider this. Which area(s) most need your attention and TLC, and is there one area, that if tended to, supports each of the other 3 areas?

Would you love some support?  Consider joining Soul Care: A Self-Care Sanctuary if you would appreciate a weekly refuge to connect with others who are dedicating this time to strengthen their own self-care practice. It's hard to do this work alone! Together is so much better!!

The opportunity is here for us to let these devastating, unsettling experiences matter for the better. Let them lead us into despair, but let them call us forward into possibility.

We are at a turning point, individually and collectively, and together we can turn the tide for a better, more healthy, more just, more peaceful, and more sustainable tomorrow. I truly believe this.

This will not be a quick fix or an easy turnabout. People will resist. You will likely resist. The struggle will be real. AND, the struggle will be worth it. Trying to go back to the old ways will show us that they no longer work for so many reasons.

After you've done your inner work, find those who can teach you and support you. Those who can help you reveal your blind spots. Those who help you to discover new perspective. Those who can help you shed old beliefs and old stories.

Then, let's go forward together. Let's rise up from the destruction and build anew, imagine anew, and create anew.

What do you stand for? How strongly are you willing to stand upon that as you act, speak, and create? What possibility are you willing to consider, even if it seems unlikely or impossible, admitting to yourself that you do not know how things will turn out?

I'm with you! Let's get started... one step at a time...committing to be in this for the long haul.

Feeling unsettled in these tumultuous times?
Join me for Light on the Hill's 2-part series: Uncertainty and Trust which begins this Tuesday, June 16th. I will be one of the panelists in the June 23rd conversation.

I'd love to hear any reflections you'd like to share below in the comment section.

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This Too Shall Pass...

3/19/2019

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What’s your reaction when you hear this message?

I’ve had very different responses, depending on my own state
of mind and what the current “this” is that I know will pass.

These words can bring comfort when I’m facing something difficult. But, they can also feel patronizing or dismissive if I’m deep
into nastiness and can’t even imagine seeing my way out!
Honestly, sometimes I just don’t want to hear it because I want
to wallow for a bit. Wallowing isn't necessarily bad.

The same message can also bring a sense of sadness when I’m
into something that I really am loving and I don’t want to ever
end. Who wants to have that dream vacation come to an end or
know that one day their time with the love of their life will come
to end?
(Check out “If We Were Vampires” by Jason Isbell if you want to have a good cry over this reality).

Nothing lasts forever.

But, in reality, these words speak the truth. Good news, bad news… nothing lasts forever! Even
if we want it to. We live in a temporary state of health and aliveness, and every now and then we
get those big reminders. Someone dies. Someone gets diagnosed. There’s a tragic
mass shooting. A house burns down. You get the idea…
And for a minute we recommit to the urgency of living our life full out!

And, then we forget and drift back into our old habits and ways, perhaps mindlessly going
through our days. Hours and days drift by and we don’t even know where they've gone or
what we've done.

Where there is breath there is possibility.

Where there is breath there is possibility. Where there is possibility there is hope. Where there
is hope there is life. How will you live yours?

What petty things can you let go of? Where can you find some surrender and acceptance?
What priorities deserve your attention?

If you were to embrace the idea that “this too shall pass” what would change for you?
Please share in the comments and let’s all step into this life, accepting this very real human truth
just a little bit more.

If you'd like to give yourself the gift of retreat to slow down in a space that fosters this type of
inner reflecgtion, please join me for one of my upcoming retreats. Our next opportunity is
this Saturday, March 23rd at the Mercy Spirituality Center in Rochester, NY - come and give
yourself A Time to Pause!

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Just a Little Light...

7/2/2017

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I was asked to write about the theme of “just a little light” this month. So many possibilities arose of where I could take it… Let your light shine; Marianne Williiamson’s famous quote, “It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us;” what lights you up? lighten up; take a lighthearted approach; light vs. dark. So many choices.

What I landed on is a reflection of the light we all have within us – what my friend, Janet Rozzi, calls our “inner pilot light.” I love this image because it reminds me that even when we can’t feel it, there is always a flicker of a flame burning below the surface, just waiting to be ignited.

You know those moments of intense aliveness when you can feel the fire burning in your belly, lighting you up from inside with excitement, love, joy, or even anticipation?? We all have those from time to time, but if we were to try to sustain this level of intensity, we would burn out!

And, then there are the moments of darkness when we barely feel a spark at all. We feel as if we are lost in the shadows, unable to find our way out. Our light has dimmed to such a low level that its power does not fuel us or feed us in a palpable way.

For most of us, those experiences represent the extremes. Most of the time we are living more in a mid-range experience – not too hot, not too cold; not too bright, not too dark. And, therefore, we barely notice the light at all.

So, it’s a good practice to remember that this light is in there, guiding us through our days, shining a beacon of possibility into the dark hours. Take moments of quiet and stillness to tune into it, to feel the aliveness gently burning within. Meet yourself where you are and notice what you need.

Through gentle inquiry, ask yourself what it is that would fan the flames to stoke the fire of vitality? Just as fire needs oxygen to fuel its flames, often times with us, breath is the perfect life-bringing force. Simply begin with the breath. Notice the expansion throughout your body and the calming of your mind as you slowly and deeply breathe in and then exhale completely.

You can also notice what it is it that causes your light to darken or dim. What changes or choices could you make to bring more light, more brightness to your days?

Remembering that we are never in a static state of blissful brightness or eternal darkness helps us to remember that we have many choices. We begin with ourselves where we are and gently nurture whatever light is there.

If we’re feeling particularly dark, we remember that we have ways to bring that sparkle back. Sometimes simply by thinking of something or someone that brings us joy can bring a smile that radiates through the eyes. We’ve all seen the people who have a glistening sparkle in their eye, and we’ve each been that person at times. What is it we want to bring in or let go of to amp up the sparkle that begins deep in our core?

Marianne Williamson’s quote closes with these words: “And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

How might we be the light and bring the light today? What difference could that make in the world?

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Finding Stillness

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