Inspired Possibility Blog

No Pressure. Presence.

5/18/2022

Right here, right now. This is the only moment I am guaranteed. So, how do I want to live it? Who do I want to be? How do I want to show up? What impact do I want to have on those around me and on some small piece of the world?

(It’s becoming clear why my theme for April’s A to Z Blog Challenge was Question (Almost) Everything! I do love questions and what they open up within us!)

Last week I wrote about Life, Death, and Rebirth as related to what I see happening in the world, particularly in this season of Spring. I wasn’t necessarily thinking about what happens within each one of us.

But, if we are alive, and we are to die (and we aren’t really certain about rebirth, though I have my ideas), how to make this moment, this day count is a powerful, compelling question to sit with. No pressure… simply presence. Awareness. Choice.

Every single one of us knows we will die – that this life will end. And, for whatever reason, we sometimes forget to live with that truth as a guiding light. We act as if we have forever – endless, limitless time.

Your Last Day

What would you do
if you learned you had
one day to live?
No second chance…
this was it.

What changes would you make?
Who would you connect with?
How would you spend your time?
What would you let go of?

Why do we act as if
we have an endless reservoir of time,
so we’ll get to it “some day?”

The truth is, none of us know
when we will leave this earth.
So, why do we wait?
Why are we so out of touch
or careless with our ways
and our days?

We all know we have
limited time here.
Why do we pretend otherwise?
Why wait to forgive,
and love,
and be our full, beautiful selves?

This is so basic
so simple,
so profound,
and so overlooked.

Not wanting to
think about death,
we fail to live
as if life really mattered.

Let’s wake up and begin today
to cherish the people,
the moments,
the perfect expressions of self.
And live as if today,
this moment,
was all we had.

©Barb Klein, 2016 from 111 Invitations: Step into the Full Richness of Life

We put things off or we wait for the big dream to come true before we can be happy. We wait til everything is “just right” before we get married, have a baby, move, or retire. We hesitate, feeling not ready until we take one more class, do one more edit, get one more certification. We fail to hit "send" on the manuscript. Sometimes we wait too long. I’ve seen people retire with grand dreams and die very soon after, before they have had a chance to do any of the things they put off.

So, how do we live while we’re here? One thing I learned from my beautiful vibrant friend, Mary Lally, is to “live your f’in life!” Thankfully, she had a doctor who gave her this advice, even when she was living with the uncertainty of advanced stage ovarian cancer in the time of Covid. She knew that this moment is the one we are guaranteed – take it. Show up for it. This is my intention, no matter what the future holds.

To live life doesn’t mean you have to do big or grand things. “Small” things count so much and may constitute the majority of our days.

How do I want to live this day? With love. With joy. With hope. Inviting in new beginnings and fresh possibilities. Open. Grateful. Present. One moment at a time. Letting "good enough" be good enough. No pressure. Just presence. Love. Love for myself, for the people I love, and for life itself, however long it may be.

How about you? How do you want to live this day? Please share. Please live. You matter.

Here’s a little musical invitation from the amazing Pink: The Last Song of Your Life.
And a meditation, if you like, with a reading of "A Mystery" from 111 Invitations - Presence.

Please consider this your invitation to live. Fully. Whatever that looks like and means to you.

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Our Need for R.E.S.T...

7/13/2021

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Coming back from a couple of days away with my husband, Tom, I am reminded how vital REST is to our spirits, bodies, minds, hearts, and nervous systems. While we were away our only goals were to rest, relax, have fun, and flow with our days.

Yesterday I spent the day reading, writing, and relaxing by the pool – dipping in when the sun got too hot, getting in the shade when I needed a break from the sun, and talking and laughing with Tom. We were lighthearted and delighted by the simplicity of the day. We did not allow work or phones to interrupt our time. We consciously chose to take this time together to enjoy life and one another. Summer is a great and easy time to do this as it seems to lend itself to it – there’s a collective energy of play, vacation, and lightness.

On our drive home we listened to a podcast with Broadway sensation, Lin-Manuel Miranda, a wildly creative man! He shared that much of his inspiration for his shows came when he was in a relaxed state – floating in a pool or on vacation. Of course, there’s much hard work involved in bringing what he creates to life, but there is also an opening for creativity that happens when he is in a state of rest.

I have experienced this myself and witnessed it in others – it may look like we’re procrastinating or not creating because there isn’t yet anything to show the world. But, in reality, when we slow down and give ourselves some spaciousness, our mind is free to dream, to imagine, to visualize and we are open to receive bursts of insight, inspiration, and artistry. Percolation time is a necessary precursor (at least for some of us) for spurts of creativity.

It struck me that we all have a deep need for rest, for so many reasons. As a society we are often rest-deprived, placing value on busy-ness and productivity over this restorative space that can feel like nothing is happening. What we miss is that often, something important is still going on even though there isn’t outer evidence or product to show. When we have time and space, we can access fresh perspectives for problem solving, and our imagination can dream up things that wouldn’t be possible if we forced them. When our nervous system can relax, we are not in a state of fight or flight, but rather receptivity, wonder, and openness. We are more likely to respond more thoughtfully than react mindlessly.

I offer you this way to look at REST:
R – Re-boot
E – Exit
S – Space
T – Time

Re-boot: Just as your computer or phone can get bogged down or frozen and needs to be powered down and then re-started, we too need periodic re-boots. Without taking a break, we become overly reactive, spinning (just like that annoying circle on your computer), going nowhere. Our nerves are frayed, we’re depleted and drained. We need to interrupt this spinning by stepping back from the habitual pace at which we move and the typical things we mindlessly do. We need to power down, unplug - choose to give ourselves an intentional break to refresh, rejuvenate, re-fuel, re-energize (so many great R words… I could go on forever, but I’ll spare you! You can add your own). This allows us to start up again with renewed energy, fresh perspective, a lighter heart.

Exit – Like a performer, sometimes we need to “exit stage left” from the center of our lives where all the activity is happening. Get out of the spotlight, step behind the curtain, take off the costume, mask, and makeup and just BE. Whether you step away for 3 minutes, 3 days, or 3 weeks, an intentional exit will give you a chance to re-boot.

Space – We need space in our lives – physical space, space in our schedule, distance from one another and time between activities. I was highly aware of this on our drive. I want several car lengths between me and the car ahead of me; I want to change lanes well before I need to make a turn and in a time when it’s safe to get over.

This tendency transfers to life for me. I don’t want to be squeezed into a tight space where I have to react without thinking, to feel pushed or rushed. In traffic or in daily life, these scenarios make me anxious. It’s easy to fill our schedules so tightly with calls or meetings that there is no room between meetings for a bathroom or meal break or even time to do the actual work. It’s even easier to fill our schedules so that there is no time available for the mini reboots (a quick walk outdoors, a conversation with a friend, a breath of fresh air or a day off), and we begin to feel an internal pressure of constraint and overwhelm. We need breathing room in our days in order to think clearly, be inspired or creative, show up to life’s challenges at the top of our game (or at least closer to it).

Time – We need time… time alone, time to move more slowly, time to breathe, time to connect and time to reflect. This goes very closely with space, as you can see. We need to allow ourselves more time than we think we need to get places and finish tasks!! How many of you are overly optimistic when it comes to those kinds of things? When we give ourselves time, we create the space which allows us to exit or step aside for a moment or more in order to re-boot.

How do you know when you need a REST?

What are your signals when it’s time for you to give yourself this critical R.E.S.T.? How does your body let you know? Your mind? Your heart? Your spirit? Learn to listen more closely for these internal signals so that you can respond with self-compassion and kindness. We want to be proactive in creating this time of R.E.S.T so that we don’t find ourselves “resting” with a headache, illness, or injury.

Taking time to re-boot, exit, and allow space and time will have a ripple effect! Not only do you benefit – the people in your life will thank you too! Give it a try and please let us know your thoughts and experiences here. How do you like to give yourself R.E.S.T.? What happens when you don’t? What’s your promise to yourself in terms of honoring this need in the next little while?

In need of a R.E.S.T? Join me on retreat...

If you're in need of some serious rest, please consider joining me, Sandra Sabene, and Carol Moon for this year's Let Your Light Shine Retreat, September 24-28th at the deeply restorative space that is Light on the Hill Retreat Center in the gorgeous Finger Lakes of Western NY! We have created this time to allow you lots of space and time to let down, to connect with your inner wisdom and inspiration, to renew and be deeply nourished physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually! Early bird registration closes July 31st!

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Yes or No?

6/8/2019

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It’s not always easy to know where to direct our attention or spend our precious energy and time. We live in an abundant world of possibilities… which is great! Until it’s not…

I, for one, can easily overwhelm and over-commit myself to too many groups (easy to do these days given the easy access to so many online groups as well as in-person ones), too many programs (anyone else a victim to the bright, shiny object syndrome??), too many practices (I love to learn and I love things that enhance my life…what can I say?)… And then I find I have too many “things” for too few hours!

And so when I woke up finding myself feeling overwhelmed, weighed down, and uncertain where to even begin I noticed the familiar tendency to freeze and just not do anything at all… or to distract myself in brilliantly disguised ways, doing things that need to be done, but maybe not right now. Or by doing things that don’t need to get done at all! That social media rabbit hole is a favorite place for me to go at times like this. How about you? Where do you go when you don’t know where to begin?

In the past two weeks I’ve been to two workshops, and I’ve loved them both! They both involve practices that I would like to bring into my everyday life. And I’m just not sure where they are going to fit in. Something needs to give to open up space in my hours. I can feel the confinement of so many things bearing down on me. The things I want to do. The things I need to do. The things that are calling me. The things that are drawing me in. And the pressures of the places I think I should show up…

I started to sit down at my desk and just start something, and very quickly realized that I had no idea where to begin. That’s when it hit me that today my morning routine had gotten disrupted and I hadn’t yet meditated. This makes all the difference in the world for me, so I took myself to my seat and sat.

When you think you don't have time...
The irony is that the moments when I don’t think I have time, is exactly when I need to make the time for the practices that support and sustain me. Meditation is one for me. Taking the time to sit with myself, to be with my breath, quiets my mind and calms my nervous system, taking me out of the reactive mode to a clearer place of discernment. From there I really can begin taking on one thing at a time with a much clearer head. I can be more discerning. I can begin.

What works for you when you get overwhelmed? How do you decide what is a "yes, this is something I will do" rather than "no!" (at least not now). Please comment so that we can all take in some new ideas. Thanks! Here’s to wise discernment and a little less overwhelm!

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If Not Now...

7/19/2018

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There is a beautiful song by Carrie Newcomer called “If Not Now” that has been playing in my mind a lot lately (and in my car because it’s on my playlist and I love it). I love the way it reassures me that though there may be trouble, we will come together “to make the change we can.” I love how it reminds us that “we may never see this moment or place or time again,” which gives me pause.

It gives me pause because surely we will never see this moment again.

It reminds me once again (because somehow I seem to forget) that really all we have for sure is this moment. What’s already happened is in the past and cannot be changed. What’s to come, we have no idea. Life is plain and simple a series of unknown moments.

“And yet we’ll take the journey, and walk it hand in hand…” (Carrie sings) as we step forward into the next moment. Where that step will take us, we do not know. What will come of the seeds we plant is yet to be determined. And, still we must step and plant, finding faith that our actions and journey matter.

So, what is it that is calling to you right now that you’re putting off or avoiding? Sometimes we feel called to work that our heart knows is right for us but that scares us for one (or many) reasons. There may be causes that you’d like to support if only you knew how. Things you’d like to try but you don’t think you’re young enough, strong enough, or wise enough… If you find yourself feeling scared and excited about the possibility, it’s at least worth exploring.

Is there something you really want to do but you think you can’t until you retire, win the lottery or until the stars align just so? What would it be like if you went ahead and did it now?

Sometimes our stories of how things should beget in our way. When I asked my husband to re-marry me, he thought for a minute and said, “but isn’t it only our 24th?” implying that these types of events typically occur on landmark anniversaries. He’s right, but I wanted that recommitment ceremony then. That was the time we needed something fun to plan for and to look forward to, and we needed to recommit our love to one another within a circle of loved ones. Life had been hard for a long time. There was no reason to put it off for a year waiting for our 25th anniversary. We went ahead and created the event, despite some initial hesitation and concern that we couldn’t find a place or get people to come on a busy day in June. It remains one of the happiest, most meaningful days in our life.

What's Your "If not now...?"

Back to you… Are there relationships that need healing? Love waiting to be expressed? Kindness and compassion being withheld? Trips you long to take but you’re waiting for that one special celebration? A job situation you know is crushing your soul but it feels too hard to change?

I’ve known too many people who put off til tomorrow what they want to do today and then when the long-awaited time comes, they’re too sick or they die before they ever have a chance to experience the joy they were waiting for. Please don’t let this be you.

Two of my favorite mantras are “Why not, why wait?” and “Life is for living now!” I am not suggesting anyone be foolish with their finances or responsibilities, but I am inviting you to seriously think about what you’re putting off. Then ponder what the hesitation is about and see if there’s a way to move toward what you desire. Sincerely ask yourself, “Why not?” and give yourself an honest answer. Weigh out the pros and cons. Play out the scenarios… one where you go ahead and one where you don’t. How do you feel when you’ve said “yes” vs. when you’ve said “no?”

Thoughts? Please share in the comments to let us know what comes up for you in this exploration and if there are any commitments you’re making to yourself right now.

If I can support you through coaching or on a retreat, I’d love to! Check out what's available at Inspired Possibility and let me know if you have any questions.

P. S. Here’s Carrie Newcomer’s song, if you’d like to listen. Maybe now?

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What Will You Do with This Day?

5/1/2018

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Your time and energy are precious and limited

There will always be more undone than done... in a day, a week, a quarter, a vacation, a lifetime... Once I truly got this deep down in my gut, it was a huge ah-ha moment!
It allowed me to get real about what's "enough!"

When we accept this reality, we get to choose in each moment how we want to spend our precious time and energy. We get to choose what is enough for us, moment to moment.

So today, how will you choose to spend your precious time? And can you be ok with letting the rest go for now? It is Sunday after all... and the sun might be shining! What would bring you sheer delight?
Go for it!! I am cheering you on with much love!

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No Pressure. Presence.

Our Need for R.E.S.T...

Yes or No?

If Not Now...

What Will You Do with This Day?

About me...

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