Inspired Possibility
  • Home
  • About
    • Testimonials
    • Privacy Policy
  • Work with Me
    • Coming Home to Yourself Coaching
    • Serenity Now Retreats
  • Events
    • Come Home to Yourself Retreat
  • The Book!
    • Book Testimonials
  • Blog
    • Subscribe
  • Resources
  • Contact

Grappling with Life's Questions

11/8/2022

0 Comments

 
PictureImage by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay
Do I matter? Does my life matter?  What’s my purpose?  Am I doing enough?  What IS enough? Whether we say them out loud or not, many of us (myself definitely included) grapple with these questions from time to time or on a regular basis.  

Even though for many years I’ve held the mantra “No striving, driving, or pushing” and I truly feel the relief and freedom in claiming that, inside I still secretly berate myself for not being ambitious enough.  When I meet people who are DOING so many great things - big things that are changing the world, I unwittingly compare myself and come up short. Even when I'm choosing to not do too much!  Even when I'm happy with life as it is and not looking to grow or do more... 

I am reminded of my friend, Steve Aman’s question to me on the last day of Leadershape - a grueling few days in the Adirondacks challenging ourselves physically, mentally, and emotionally in an arena that was not my strength.  There had been things I had opted out of (and then reluctantly and with a ton of support tried again).  There had been things that terrified me, things that amused me, things I was willing enough to try and others that were an absolute “Oh, hell no!” 

I was not going to scale a telephone pole, somehow find a way to stand on top of it and throw myself into space toward some acrobat bar.  I was not going to blindfold myself and walk forward (or backward as some did) on the high beam or across the broken swing bridge.  I did get myself to the wire and across it.  I did pair up with Michael and do the “Wild Woozy,” leaning into each other’s hands as we traversed wires that slowly drifted further and further apart so that the only thing holding us up was our weight leaning into each other’s hands.  And I DID rappel off the 80’ cliff (or 800’ - I honestly don’t remember!  I only knew it was a BIG number that terrified me), even after watching some pretty skillful people get caught upside down for a bit. 

So, on this last day there - a day designed for “play,” my dear friend Steve asked me, “Do you have anything left to prove?”  The answer was clear.  No, I did not… “Then go have fun,” he grinned and sent me on my way.  I could watch others perform their feats and cheer them on, but I had done enough.  I’d do the swing and scream my primal scream ‘cause that looked kind of fun… but, other than that, I was good. 

So, in life.  How do we know when we’ve done enough?  How do we reach a point of nothing more to prove?  Is it measured by a certain income or amount in our bank account or retirement fund?  Does it come from winning a certain award or working your way up to a particular title?  Is it the number of hours you work or the number of people you’ve served or the number of likes or views on your Instagram post?  Giving a TEDx talk?  Does it come after we’ve finally done or created “the thing?” We’ve written the book, created the program, given the talk, taught at THE place in THE room or on THE stage we’ve been aiming for… is that enough?  

It doesn’t seem it.  More often than not, people seem to turn around and start striving again for the next thing.  Sometimes they barely even acknowledge that accomplishment (no matter how huge) before shooting for the next. 

I’d like to share a little reflection I wrote about “Enough,” rising out of a beautiful conversation with my friend, Sharon Rosen, who told me of a beautiful Hebrew word, dayenu.  As Sharon explained it to me, dayenu means “it would have been enough.”  What a concept.  Something to rest into.  The way I want to live - so that when I die, I truly can feel “it was enough.” 

Enough
by Barb Klein
 
If I only did well with my own family, it would be enough.
If I only wrote this book for me, it would be enough.
If I’d only ever done what I’ve already done, it would have been enough.
If I could remember and believe this, I would believe I have nothing left to prove.  Nothing at all…
I am enough.  Exactly as I am.  What I’ve done - is enough.
 

Can I lean into my own enoughness?  Can I embrace it and simply live the rest of my life for me, tending to me?  Trusting that that will allow me to show up for others as a way that feels good, fills me, isn’t like the way anyone else is doing it? 

Can I let go of ideas of how things should go and allow them to unfold? 
Can I allow myself to be supported?
Can I be willing to ask for opportunities and for help to find these opportunities?
Focus on my own healing, growth, creativity, and let it lead where it may (or not).

It is enough. 
It will have been enough.
I feel the deep contentment in that.
 
It’s time to heal - to release all the grief I carry - to breathe in the pines.  To listen to the wind - to feel the breeze.
It’s enough.
 
Let go the rushing.
Let go the frenzy.

Let them have their fun - their antics - their way. 
You have yours and it is not theirs, most certainly.
You, my beloved, are enough, just as you are. 

If I never lost another pound,
built another muscle,
or walked another mile,
It would be enough. 
 
Nothing to push for, strive for, or drive for!
Those days are behind me.

There’s no goal I can achieve
that will make me any more me.
 
And that’s all I long to be -
Fully, wholeheartedly me!
 
We are such fascinating creatures with our stories of “I’m not enough!  I’m too much!  I have to do more! I have to keep going, doing, achieving, proving…”  Is any of it true?  Worth checking in on!  We are each whole, complete, and completely worthy just by being.  Our worth is not determined by anything outside of ourselves.  And we are the only ones who can decide for ourselves how much we want to do, how much we need to create, how much we need to serve, and what is enough. 
 
I invite you to check out Jen Louden’s wisdom on the Conditions of Enoughness and see how you might apply this in your own life.  YOU get to decide.  You get to define what is enough for you, based on your very real life.  You get to choose to lighten up a bit on yourself.  And to keep practicing, over and over, because this too, is a practice.  I’m working on it. 
 
Where can you lower the bar for yourself rather than continually raising it, raising it, raising it?  What can you rest into as “exactly enough?”  What are you striving for that you can relax about, let go of?  We are so hard on ourselves and so easily judgmental of what we have or haven’t done.  
 
Just for today… be gentle with yourself.  Just for today… let it be enough.  Whatever “it” is. 
 

0 Comments

Your comment will be posted after it is approved.


Leave a Reply.

    Subscribe

    About me...

    I am a writer, coach, and teacher, and I love capturing life's many moments through writing, whether that be journalling, blogging, poetry, or essay.  I have always found the written word as a natural way for me to express what lies within.  

    This is the space where we get real.  I will write about my life experiences and things that I find my clients encounter in their daily lives.   

    What's real for you? What would you like me to write about?  Feel free to share with me topics you would like to see discussed and please join in the dialogue through the comment section. Your engagement makes the blog a much richer place to hang out!

    Thank you for joining me on this journey!!    

    Archives

    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    July 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    August 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    September 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    March 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    October 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    November 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    May 2016
    February 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    September 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014

    Categories

    All
    Addiction
    #AtoZ Challenge
    Balance
    Biopsy
    Cancer
    Career
    Challenge
    Change
    Choice
    Comfort Zone
    Commitment
    Compassion
    Connection
    Coronoavirus
    COVID 19
    COVID-19
    Discernment
    Discomfort
    Disconnect
    Dreams
    Election
    Empathy
    Empowerment
    Extraordinary
    Family Recovery
    Freedom
    Grace
    Gratitude
    Grief
    Health
    Holidays
    Hope
    Inner Work
    Inquiry
    Inspiration
    Intention
    Intuition
    Joy
    Kindness
    Letting Go
    Life
    Light
    Logic
    Loving Kindness
    Meditation
    Mental Health
    Mindfulness
    Mom
    National Recovery Month
    New Year
    Overwhelm
    Pause
    Peace
    Perfectionism
    Personal Growth
    Perspective
    Possibility
    Presence
    Procrastination
    Purpose
    Quarantine
    Recovery
    Relationships
    Responsibility
    Rest
    Retreat
    Sadness
    Self Awareness
    Self Care
    Self-care
    Self Compassion
    Self-compassion
    Self Renewal
    Self-renewal
    Slowing Down
    Solstice
    Sport
    Stillness
    Strength
    Substance Use Disorder
    Support
    Thanksgiving
    Time
    Transition
    Wellbeing

    RSS Feed

Barb Klein
Inspired Possibility
585-705-8740
barb@inspiredpossibility.com